This is a summary, but I will expand on it later today. The 6th anniversary of our reconnection was about a month and a half ago, and that makes this an appropriate time to reflect and to write about what happened and where we are now.
Short version: just over six years ago, I discovered my wife had a secret email account. Motivated by curiosity, I guessed the password and started reading. I was shocked to discover that my wife did not like me at all, and was talking about divorce with her brother and friends... including an ex-boyfriend who I knew she occasionally spoke with on the phone.
In retrospect, shouldn't have been all that shocking, as my wife had been fairly cold toward me for years... and as I thought about it, I realized I had really been a terrible husband. She had gone into some detail with her friends about all of my flaws, and I had to admit that she had a point.
I was very much in shock, and I left work for a break to take a walk around the building and think. I realized that I wasn't ready to walk away, and I decided to fight for my marriage - and to earn back my wife's affection and esteem. And I realized I had an advantage that most folks don't have - I'd seen her emails, and knew exactly, in her own words, where I missed the mark and what she couldn't stand about me. She'd unintentionally given me a roadmap back (I hoped) to her heart.
I started that night...