I just wanted to say Hi to everybody. It's so great to see so many people I've missed. My life is as crazy as usual. My marriage is going strong and thriving, even if we don't follow every single rule, or fit into a round hole. *waving* :starfish:

Hey, star*fish!

Here's my update...

My divorce is in progress, slowly. STBX got a temp sub position and can't get his own place. He's hoping (and I'm hoping) for another job he just applied for, about an hour away and full time.

He's actually become a fantastic housemate now that my SD is out of the house, but I'm not going to back out again, since he only acts right when I have divorce paperwork pending.

At this point he wants to go ahead with the D, and perhaps date and see if we can put our relationship back together once we're each more stable. I think that he thinks this is all about SD and DD, and once they're "out of the picture" we have nothing to keep us apart.

Anyway, I'm open to reconciling if he can actually show substantive changes over time, but right now I need a safe and healthy environment for me and DD.

More to come, I'm sure.

Be there or be square!.

I have avatar failure and I don't know why.

Weaves, if you want to email it to me, admin@marriageadvocates.com, I'll get it set up for you. It's fairly late in the evening for me, but I can set it up in the morning if not tonite.

Almost like old times, eh?

Didn't know I could speak Canuck, didya?

Mark

I had that same problem. I had to upload it several times. It was when I edited another field at the same time and saved the result that my avatar appeared.

You don't have to fit into a round hole, as long as I get to be a mermaid!

Sounds like a deal...but do you have to be "queen" of the mermaids too?

I guess I should post an update on my personal life and progress, as I've been absent from the radar for more years than I was on it.

My ex and I separated on November 4, 2005. My life improved immediately. I was content. Yes, my home was a disaster, but I could fix it up and it would stay that way. I felt safe. I did mundane things and enjoyed them to the hilt. Just having a DVD night with my favorite movies or shows was something I greatly enjoyed. My favorite CD was Mary J. Blige's "No More Drama". I listened to it ad nauseum.

I first consulted a divorce attorney in mid-January of 2006. At the time, I figured that XH would never do what I needed, so divorce was my only option. (No, living with it was not ever an option for me.) My company went out of business just over a week later, so those plans were put on hold.

By the second week in February I was done. Really done. There were no outward changes, of course, but internally a huge shift had happened. At that time, I knew I didn't want him back, and would not take him back, even if he did everything he'd ever promised me he'd do. I was just done. I told him I wanted a divorce. This was the first time I'd ever told him that.

In late March, I began seeing my fiance.

In mid-April 2006, I paid my retainer and filed for divorce. It was a long, drawn-out, acrimonious ordeal. My divorce was finalized in July 2007.

I lived in India for a year (2007); then, we came back to the states and started building a life here.

I cannot go through all the personal changes to me; honestly, I'm not the same person. I was transformed, not just by what was happening with the divorce, but by my new and varied experiences.

Hi to all.

(poster formally known as Mkeverydaycnt, MEDC, and a host of other names).

It's nice to see some familiar "faces" here.

Hi medc...welcome. "a host of other names" huh? LOL As the saying goes "just don't call me late for dinner".

Hi SF...yes, after I was banned, I decided to prove that I could still post as I pleased. I have outed myself so many times to the mods that it is hard to keep track of all the alias' I have used.

Hi all, I am afraid to say who I am since so many dislike me.....I used to be Stellakat, Baba, and Bubbles. Been kicked off some boards so many times I dont remember...

I'm pretty certain I don't dislike you.

I think I know who you are....

Hi, I used to post as ears_open. I wasn't able to revive my marriage to a point I could start trusting in it again. I threw in the towel January 2009, but my H was out of work, so I waited to start the legal process until January 2010, when he started back working. H is still in the house until our divorce is granted. We file today, so it should be less than a month to go. We wanted our kids to have a two-parent home, but we tried as hard as we could for as long as we could.

It's so good to see you all!

This must be the update thread.

Things are going pretty well for us. Right now Docp and I are dealing with a bit of a communication problem. IMO, it is far better to be dealing with "regular" marital problems than infidelity problems.

It was a bit ironic I received the info about this board yesterday because I had just stated searching for a forum to discuss our communication issue and had actually joined a site. I hadn't even had a chance to read anything on the other forum when the invite for here was in my email. I showed this place to Docp and told him he is more than welcome, but I won't hold my breath he will join.

I dug out a couple old books I started to read a few year ago and never finished. So hopefully it will help once I actually read the whole book.

I sometimes feel like we are going in circles about the same things and despite the fact I feel I've changed the dance steps in how I deal with it I must not be doing it right because we still end up in the same circle.

Since I've been away from the other board for well over a year some names aren't looking familiar to me. It will be nice to get to meet new people

LC

STELLAAAAAAAAAAAA! (always wanted a reason to do that!)

I think kittycat and catperson would naturally get along just fine...

Hi kitty!

Meouuuuuuu!

Yeah, we were always the ones to get in the most trouble over at MB, that's for sure!

T-R-O-U-B-L-E!!!!

It is my middle name!

Nice to read here. And especially nice to see you again, LC.