Al Turtle has an interesting chart Here!
At one point in my life, I was taking a course in cultural psychology - I had lived in Japan for a couple of years prior to that time and thus had some insight into what the professor was trying to teach us.
I was much like the Iceberg that Al posts.
See, while I had been in Japan, I had noticed that the Japanese had several layers to their personalities.
First was their public face, with several variables, depending on who they were dealing with. Next, was their family face, followed by their carefully hidden private face.
And of course, their subconscious face, which Al also mentions.
I listened to what the Professor had to say, thought about compartmentalization, something that males are good at, and formed an early version of the iceberg theory that Al presents in far more detail and better developed that mine ever was.
Click on the link, observe and read, I think you will see how the Iceberg theory explains a lot about how people react in a relationship.