This was posted by Amadahy on 11/13/2014:
Perspective - walking a mile, down the same path, in someone else's shoes STILL doesn't let you see things from their POV.
You are not them. Often, I am amazed when going on a hike with my husband and children, just what each person notices. We are all walking the same mile...but we often see and feel and experience completely different things.
Generally speaking, my husband looks for places he shouldn't go, animals he shouldn't touch etc. The challenge and the finish line. He approaches all things, including our marriage, this way. What is the objective and what can he over come and win.
my youngest son is looking for rocks to climb on. Please, please, please, don't make him stay on the trail. The rocks become his, the tress - his. He will want to show other people those same rocks that he claimed the first time through.
My middle son - he wants to finish the hike first, win. He's a lot like his father. Quiet, introspective. He will look at the view and absorb it all. But he is always moving ahead. If he is competing with someone, its full steam ahead. If I am on the trial he bounces between wanting to lead the pack and wanting to stay with me, make sure I am okay. Once he has finished the hike...he never wants to do it again. He already did it once. Why repeat it. Been there, done that. move on
My eldest son is a sheperd. He will bring up the rear of the trial and make sure everyone gets home safe. You will never find him leading, unless he sees a need for the leader. Generally, he is the one bird dogging everyone home. He wants to talk about everything, always making sure everyone else is okay. He notices the potato bug on the rock and will talk for 30 min about why its called a potato bug.
I want to see, smell, hear and feel everything. I want to take my time and enjoy the hike. I don't really want it to end. And when its done, I want to go back.
Same hike - different perspectives.
And when we give advice about how to best do that hike to someone else.
My husband will give advise on the gear you should bring, the places you should park, etc.
my youngest son will tell you which trees he peed on and offer to show you his favorite rocks.
My middle son will say he saw some nice rocks - but its in the past. I subtle knod and "it was nice" is about all you will get out of him.
My eldest son will talk about all of it - at length - and then want to guide you on it. Make sure you see and experience it all. And get you home safe.
Each person takes from the hike something different
perspective. same hiking boots - pretty much.
And if the hike was hard and you almost didn't make it - you may come away energized by the challenge you overcame - or bitter that you had to walk it.
That also colors your advice when you give it to people now on the hike.