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**Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** #38676
12/21/10 01:52 PM
12/21/10 01:52 PM
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Ace Online OP
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Many can't eat when they get upset.

Not me!

When things get tough I fight the urge to grab food with an entitled feeling of "I deserve this!" That's part of the reason I gained about 100 pounds over a 20 year span (and regained 50 of the 80 I lost between 2002 and 2007).

While reading TimeHeals' excellent post about changing past/present/future positive attitudes and actions, I was reminded of my Emotional Eating habits.

I don't really care to delve into the reasons unless they are needed to build a foundation for changing my mental attitude.

TH mentioned having a PMA = Positive Mental Attitude, a term I am familiar with from the many motivational classes and workshops I've taken.

How can I change 40 + years of having a Negative Mental Attitude regarding my urges to grab comfort food when things are challenging?

Anyone else have this problem? (I realize that many are just the opposite and have inadvertantly lost tons of weight on the unhealthy but often inevitable Infidelity Diet, which could be an interesting topic for another thread.)

All brainstorming ideas are welcome....even if you don't have a specific solution to offer.

For me, getting control of this instinctive Emotional Eating habit will greatly improve my health and ultimately our marriage. (And if I'm not the only one with this problem, others will be helped, too!)

Thanks,
Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #38708
12/21/10 02:47 PM
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Ace, I have dropped 60+ over the last 9 months and have a few ideas...

I found that cutting out sugar and bread took away cravings. The more processed sugar I ate the more I wanted...some was never enough.

Bread, especially white rolls, french and italian bread, etc. gave me sugar like spikes...multigrain was better, but Triscuit crackers, etc. stopped that and fed my cravings for carbs without being so immediately digestable.

I have a diet soup recipe that I love. It is basically a chicken stock soup base with black beans, diced tomatoes, spinach, minced garlic, halapeno peppers, olive oil, a carrot, pulled chicken from baked or roasted chicken, and fried onions to give a french onion soup flavor. You add grated parmesian or romano cheese for some calcium and to help slightly cut down the hot from the peppers.

It satisfies all the vitamin and fiber needs while raising metabolism with peppers and adding protein from chik and beans. I eat it twice or more a day and it lasts between meals stopping my cravings.

I also started eating yogurt again and adding whole flax seeds..your body uses energy to break down the outside kernel, and it gives fiber and omega 3 fatty acids you need. The yogurt helps digestion and gives calcium.

Point being, my emotional needs for food aren't triggered so much if my body HAS THE GOOD STUFF ALREADY IN IT....

I reach for a Ricola cough drop instead once in a while. The sugar rush doesn't happen when the drops last so long and it reminds me that this is NOT candy.....that is is MEDICINE for my soul. (my visualization)

Finally, I exercise morning and night...Hell, I'm alone now, who is to say what I can and can't do anymore and when. I don't have a set schedule for that yet, that might help..

I noticed that I was able to keep from feeling so lonely when I watched an exercise video instead of simply working out to some tunes..(plus the ladies in the videos are an incentive to try and get there again someday).

And yes, I use ladies fitness routines and read women's self help articles. It is fascinating to read a different perspective but I can be caught up in it too much, too....hell, read my posts..


Thanks for trying, folks...but this pig is way past lipstick.
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Rural Idiot] #38717
12/21/10 03:05 PM
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Ace,

I'm with you - if I'm working hard in a tricky situation or if I'm ill then I reward myself with food treats.

It times of extreme anxiety and stress - when I feel powerless, I stop eating, lose appetite.


Married 22years (this year) ~13y since dday(?)
DD17 DS14
Which way do you like yourself? ~ Stosny
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Squeaky Tree] #38739
12/21/10 03:59 PM
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Ace, the only magic bullet when it comes to over eating is simply not to do it. I know this is a "duh" statement, but it's absolutely true.

If you're going to over eat, it's time to start changing what you eat. Get the junk food out of the house. Get the breads out of the house unless you're eating breads like Ezekial brand.

I can match eating consumption with the best of them out there. XL pizza-check, I can eat that. 1.5 pound burger and fries-check, I can eat that. 1/2 gallon of ice cream-check, not a problem, I can eat that.

So what's in my fridge? Lots of beef, chicken, vegetables, turkey bacon, olives, and frozen fruits. Now we do have some fruit snacks and crackers for the kids but most of that stuff I just don't like to eat anyway unless I have crazy beer munchies.

If you eat 'clean' 90 percent of the time, the other 10 percent won't matter near as much and isn't going to show on that waistline.

One of the problems is people really have no idea what it means to 'eat healthy'. They think vegetables and fruits...stuff like that but really have no idea how to put it together. And they're deluded into thinking that if something says Whole Wheat it's good for you.

Overeating? Don't do it. Seriously, you have will power. If you're going to over eat, change what you have access to. Wanna lose weight? Seek out bodybuilders or bodybuilding websites. I guarrantee you no one has a better grasp on nutrition for physique purposes than those guys/gals.


Some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great. I just am great. --K. Powers

Somebody may beat me, but they are going to have to bleed to do it. --Prefontaine



Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: kilted_thrower] #38877
12/21/10 09:35 PM
12/21/10 09:35 PM
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I am addicted to cake, cookies, and ice cream. I had gestational diabetes, when I changed my diet I ate more, was never hungry, and LOST weight while 7 months pregnant (and without exercising at all - I was also on bed rest).

Food diaries realllly help me. For my health issues, I had to concentrate on sugars, not calories. If I write down everything I eat and look at the sugar numbers, I can always tell if I'm on the right track. If my sugar numbers are in line, then I am usually not feeling hungry during the day.

I stopped buying cookies, cakes, brownie mixes, candy, ice cream, potato chips, and other comfort foods. The nutritionist told me to make sure I ate more protein or fats, especially if I was eating anything with carbs. I was also instructed to eat a morning and afternoon snack every day. All of that helps control your sugar swings. I ate a lot of cheese and crackers, a lot of eggs on whole-wheat English muffins, and started eating more veggies than fruits (cucumbers were a great crunchy snack for me). I also found "legal" ways to satisfy my cravings - fruit popsicles, mini containers of ice cream so I couldn't eat a whole quart, etc. And I discovered that pizza and burritos are actually pretty good for you in the grand scheme of things smile

If I'm eating properly, when I'm caught in my head and have the impulse to reach for food, I realize that I'm not hungry and can sometimes stop the craving just by reminding myself that I'm full. If that doesn't work, I have to get active - go outside and go for a walk, put on music and dance around the living room, pace around the room and call a friend, or SOMETHING to get the edge off the stress. And sometimes I still lose the urge and reach for my comfort food A few slip-ups here and there are okay; no one is perfect.


Current spouse: Night. D10, D9, S7

About me

You can't direct the wind, but you can adjust your sails.

http://www.divorcedmomfinances.com
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #38910
12/21/10 10:44 PM
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I tend to be an emotional eater too.

I don't keep anything in my house that I would binge on, and I mostly keep "clean" food in the house. My pantry is a pretty grim place when I have the munchies wink

Also, I totally agree that when I'm proactively eating good stuff (TONS of green veggies, lots of healthy protein and fat) I am less likely to eat emotionally.


we: me44 + my husband Pookie :9: + S9 + D6
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Rural Idiot] #39139
12/22/10 05:40 PM
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Excellent points, RI. I will take this part to heart:

Point being, my emotional needs for food aren't triggered so much if my body HAS THE GOOD STUFF ALREADY IN IT....

Excellent other ideas, too ST, CR, FM and KT but no time to respond right now. I will be back to comment more sooner or later.

Thanks,
Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Squeaky Tree] #39232
12/22/10 07:55 PM
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Sounds like you have the best of both worlds, ST. Just kidding. ROFL

Looking at your scenario, it seems that you reward yourself with treats when you're sick and tired and working hard.

Then when you're stressed and anxious, you lose your appetite.

I guess the answer for me if I was in your shoes would be to find good healthy treats that I really like.

Then, eliminate all stress and anxiety from my life so I keep my appetite for the healthy snacks I eat when I'm .....uh.....sick and tired. crazy

Wait a minute, what's wrong with this picture????? scratch

Seriously, ST, I think I know what you mean. But I've only experienced a tinge of losing my appetite due to stress or anxiety twice, I think. I kinda wish it would happen more often and wonder what that's like.

I know, I know.... bad thinking! But I still wonder....

Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: kilted_thrower] #39238
12/22/10 08:11 PM
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Thanks for the pep talk, KT. I know what to do but I often need this kind of inspiration to do what I know to do.

I guess that's kinda why I started this thread. It will be good for me and others to get tips on playing the head games we need to win in order to quit digging our graves with our forks, spoons and fingers.

So, KT, have you ever been more than 50 pounds overweight with flab and blubber (not muscle mass)? Sorry for the TMI but it's an honest question.

I weigh far more than people think I do because I really do have large bones and exceptional muscle mass. It's the stuff on the outside of those bones and muscles that need to be eliminated.

And I know that it starts in the head.

Thoughts.

It's what I used to lose those 80 pounds in 5 years....control my thoughts.

I think that one of my problems is that now, years later, my age makes things harder than it was when I was peri-menopausal. <sigh> My doctor did say that my weight loss greatly diminished my menopause symptoms. It's harder now than it was before...some of the things I did before don't work so well now.

I will buckle down and do this again by building the right thoughts and working to control my self-talk because I have all that I need at my disposal:

1. Ability to move without pain. CHECK! thumbsup
2. Resources to get healthy food. CHECK! thumbsup
3. Support from those who care about me. CHECK! thumbsup
4. Conscious ability to control the stuff that goes in my mouth. CHECK! thumbsup
5. Sub-conscious support. UNCHECK. frown
This is why I started this thread as I lack this so far. At least that's the only excuse I can think of for now.

Thanks for the KITB, KT...please stick around! cool

Ace

Last edited by Ace; 12/22/10 08:13 PM.

We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: CajunRose] #39241
12/22/10 08:15 PM
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Great tips CR and FM but I'll have to reply more later.

Thanks,
Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: flowmom] #40390
12/26/10 01:23 PM
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Originally Posted By: flowmom
I tend to be an emotional eater too.

I don't keep anything in my house that I would binge on, and I mostly keep "clean" food in the house. My pantry is a pretty grim place when I have the munchies wink


I used the Weight Watchers list of 'free foods' when I lost my 80 pounds a few years ago. 2 things changed: Weight Watchers just changed their free foods list! (Most fruits are now on it!) And my efforts in what used to work are not as effective anymore. (I used to be able to eat more 'cheat' foods daily but that habit has to go it seems.)

Originally Posted By: flowmom
Also, I totally agree that when I'm proactively eating good stuff (TONS of green veggies, lots of healthy protein and fat) I am less likely to eat emotionally.


So, FM, what kinds of 'healthy protein and fats' do you consider part of your "proactive good stuff?"

Thanks,
Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: CajunRose] #40394
12/26/10 01:47 PM
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Originally Posted By: CajunRose
I am addicted to cake, cookies, and ice cream. I had gestational diabetes, when I changed my diet I ate more, was never hungry, and LOST weight while 7 months pregnant (and without exercising at all - I was also on bed rest).


Can you box and market your method of eating more, never being hungry, not exercising, staying in bed and still losing weight? Pregnant or not, that sounds like a winner! grin

Originally Posted By: CajunRose
Food diaries realllly help me. For my health issues, I had to concentrate on sugars, not calories. If I write down everything I eat and look at the sugar numbers, I can always tell if I'm on the right track. If my sugar numbers are in line, then I am usually not feeling hungry during the day.


Thanks for reminding me. I have a form for a food diary that worked for me when I got started years ago. I will get it out today. THANKS! You're right. That is a very helpful simple thing.....I often avoided eating stuff because I didn't want to have to write it down.

Originally Posted By: CajunRose
I stopped buying cookies, cakes, brownie mixes, candy, ice cream, potato chips, and other comfort foods. The nutritionist told me to make sure I ate more protein or fats, especially if I was eating anything with carbs. I was also instructed to eat a morning and afternoon snack every day. All of that helps control your sugar swings. I ate a lot of cheese and crackers, a lot of eggs on whole-wheat English muffins, and started eating more veggies than fruits (cucumbers were a great crunchy snack for me). I also found "legal" ways to satisfy my cravings - fruit popsicles, mini containers of ice cream so I couldn't eat a whole quart, etc. And I discovered that pizza and burritos are actually pretty good for you in the grand scheme of things smile


Great tips. I did much of the same when losing weight. But since it was less expensive to make 'my own' 100 calorie baggies for snacks, I quit buying the pre-measured munchies. The only problem is that now, I find myself measuring out the 100 calorie amounts....but eating the rest after only making a few packets. eek

Originally Posted By: CajunRose
If I'm eating properly, when I'm caught in my head and have the impulse to reach for food, I realize that I'm not hungry and can sometimes stop the craving just by reminding myself that I'm full. If that doesn't work, I have to get active - go outside and go for a walk, put on music and dance around the living room, pace around the room and call a friend, or SOMETHING to get the edge off the stress. And sometimes I still lose the urge and reach for my comfort food A few slip-ups here and there are okay; no one is perfect.


Unfortunately for me, those "few slip-ups" often lead to massive binging and giving up 'until the next day'. When many of those types of days are strung together (like for me this past week), changes need to happen.

Last night after our family Christmas dinner, the kids (ages 18-31) set up a virtual program called "Just Dance" or something like that. It was a contest between dancers who help controllers in their hands that relayed their movements to a centrally placed sensor and points were earned by matching the dancers moves with the dancers on the screen.

They wanted me to join them but I had eaten so much I had to refrain. As we were leaving, I heard the 21 year old bemoan the fact that her nearly 80 year old granny (a former elementary PE teacher for 35 years) had beaten her score! blush

I think the game belongs to my DD so I'll see if she can set it up here this week. I have to work Monday and Tuesday but will have another 5 day week-end and I am planning to follow all these great tips this week.

What kinds of exercises work for you?

Please check back in whenever you think of more tips that help (or hurt) your healthy efforts.

Thanks for all your input.

Ace

Last edited by Ace; 12/27/10 01:01 AM. Reason: correct name of dance program from "Let's Dance" to "Just Dance"

We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #40573
12/27/10 12:54 AM
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Ace, I haven't been 50 pounds overweight before. Well, I have been overweight, it could've been 50 pounds...I don't know. I can tell you that I didn't look very good. Lots of alcohol, careless eating, no exercise=not a nice looking physique.

Here's a contest I went into over this last summer. I will say the before pics of me are pretty bad as I had the contestants had a 10 day heads up on the contest and I made sure I made full use of 10 days with a lot of beer, pizza, olive oil, and butter.
http://crackberry.com/60-day-blackberry-...inner-announced

There were several hundred of us that started and when it came to voting day, there was only 4 of us left. You should've seen some of the hater posts I got from people saying my results weren't realistic and etc. Ah well, haters will hate. I gotz abz...they aint.


Some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great. I just am great. --K. Powers

Somebody may beat me, but they are going to have to bleed to do it. --Prefontaine



Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: kilted_thrower] #40577
12/27/10 01:12 AM
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Originally Posted By: kilted_thrower
Ace, I haven't been 50 pounds overweight before. Well, I have been overweight, it could've been 50 pounds...I don't know. I can tell you that I didn't look very good. Lots of alcohol, careless eating, no exercise=not a nice looking physique.

Here's a contest I went into over this last summer. I will say the before pics of me are pretty bad as I had the contestants had a 10 day heads up on the contest and I made sure I made full use of 10 days with a lot of beer, pizza, olive oil, and butter.
http://crackberry.com/60-day-blackberry-...inner-announced

There were several hundred of us that started and when it came to voting day, there was only 4 of us left. You should've seen some of the hater posts I got from people saying my results weren't realistic and etc. Ah well, haters will hate. I gotz abz...they aint.


CONGRATULATIONS! Thanks for sharing that. what an inspiration. You and Will did a great job. (How did Will Power become your best close personal friend?...that's what I need to know!)

Again, thanks for sharing KT. I know the Diet & Fitness thread went on a diet boycott until after New Years. I decided to weigh in tomorrow...it's goin' ta be ugly...and start my date with WILL on Tuesday. Maybe my H wants to join us. He runs 5 miles a day so he can keep pitching (overhand baseball) when he turns 60 next year. But we both could improve our eating habits.

Appreciate your dropping in, KT. Please stick around. Our marriage will be enhanced greatly when we both can get control of our healthy habits.

Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #43828
01/03/11 12:49 AM
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Raquel73 announced her ambitious goals for her weight and health on her Success Story thread. Then she asked posters what others are going to do. Rather than clutter up her fine thread I thought I'd answer here.

Everyone is welcome to join in. IMVHO a healthy weight is one of the major factors in one's self esteem and other marriage aspects.

I'll share my basic goals and post what worked for me in my previous attempts to lose weight; it's maintaining the loss that is very difficult.

1) Take a before weight-loss picture. I had my H take one beside our Christmas Tree today.

2) Commit to take during weight-loss pictures, not after weight-loss pictures. This healthy eating process is a never-ending life-long journey, not an event that is over once the desired weight is reached.

3) Keep my food journal like I did before. Track water intake and limit all other fluids (which is easy for me since my favorite drinks are cold, hot, or tepid water).

4) Chart my weight every day initially and then at least once a week when I've adopted proper habits in a few weeks. (For some, weighing daily sabotages them but it's an inspiration for me...and worked before so I will do it again.)

5) Work out on a regular basis at home or at Curves like I have since 2002.

6) I will find my articles and inspirational DVD I produced after losing 80 pounds and watch it. <sigh>

7) I'll post excerpts from the articles here as time allows (but now I have to go).

Anyone wanna join in? All I ask is that you check in at least once a week and share something that made you mad or sad and how you got glad without reaching for food.

It'll be great to collect stories and inspire each other with little and then big successes in controlling our emotional eating, reaching our healthy weight goals, and improving ourselves and our marriages.

Thanks,
Ace

Last edited by Ace; 01/03/11 12:54 AM. Reason: add link to Raquel's Success Story thread

We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #44352
01/03/11 10:38 PM
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OK Ace....We'll do this again! I've topped out at more than I was this time last year when we did this- my BMI has just tipped to unhealthy. Time to stop feeling sorry for myself and finding excuses. Count the blessings and get on with it.

I had a good start to the day...in fact a good day until I found the Xmas chocs this evening....oooops.....well, they'll all be gone soon.

My goals:

1) eat a proper lunch (tend to skip it cos i don't get home form work til after 1 and then there is so much to do before the school run)
2) no carbs in the evening
3) I might try weighing every day for the first couple of weeks, (I think I might respond to the challenge more)
4) take my exercise cautiously...not to run before I can walk
5) do my stretches every day and train J to help me with them


Thanks Ace


Married 22years (this year) ~13y since dday(?)
DD17 DS14
Which way do you like yourself? ~ Stosny
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Squeaky Tree] #44354
01/03/11 10:39 PM
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Oh yeah...and what you said about treats - smoked salmon or prawn salad, olives and anchovies, sundried tomatoes and feta....these are the new chocolate!!!!!!!


Married 22years (this year) ~13y since dday(?)
DD17 DS14
Which way do you like yourself? ~ Stosny
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #45092
01/05/11 06:55 AM
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Okay, Day 3 - No sugar despite it being in very tempting spot in the office!

I worked for an hour yesterday, mostly aerobic. Today I did some more aerobic, and weightlifting. I am trying to work out 6 days a week, at least an hour per day.

No more soda, diet or otherwise. I'm just drinking my crystal light and 2 cups of coffee in the morning - I absolutely refuse to give up my coffee. Today I had a hot tea in the afternoon.

Eating lots of veggies, fruits, and protein. Trying to ration the portion size. Had 2 scrambled eggs and a yogurt for breakfast. Leftover pot roast (about 4 oz) with some carrots, potatoes, and onion. Snack - 2 mozzarella chees sticks and a small pear. Dinner - homemade chicken vegetable soup. I think I done good.

I will probably weigh myself about once a week or once every 2 weeks. I really hate scales. I hate photos of me, too. Don't think I will do that until I have at least dropped a clothing size.

I am also reading more on nutrition and going more for organic products, avoiding high fructose corn syrup and going to Farmer's markets. I just watched a documentary called "Food Inc" and I really have been rethinking how and what I eat. Everyone should watch this documentary - you will be shocked when you find out what you're really eating!

We can do this!!!

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Raquel73] #45097
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Great job Racquel
Your work out schedule sounds great. 4 years ago, I did 45 mins full on aerobic 5x a week along wiht the healthy eating and lost 3 1/2 stone - 45lb in 6months.
My scales said 2lb lighter this morning! That is incentive! (and although I was brill through the day- avoiding the staff room treats, I found that naughty box of chocs last evening)

I upped my water intake yesterday and made sure I had a large glass this morning before brekkies - so I guess my 2lb loss will be water loss.

Haven't done the photo yet.

Quote:
We can do this!!!


Married 22years (this year) ~13y since dday(?)
DD17 DS14
Which way do you like yourself? ~ Stosny
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Squeaky Tree] #45127
01/05/11 02:12 PM
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ST, I do remember last year's efforts now that you mention it. (I hosted a "Biggest Loser" or Bee Elle contest on my MB Success Stories thread.) Not sure why that thread got poofed but this is a better place for it anyhow.

Not gonna do a Bee Elle thing this year, but I'm so glad you've all posted here. Anyone is welcome and I have a new idea.

How 'bout we give ourselves starfishies regarding our healthy eating and healthy work out efforts whenever we post?

Going 3 days with no sugar sounds like five starfish starfish starfish starfish starfish to me! Way to go Raquel!

For me? I'll give myself starfish starfish starfish for my eating and workout efforts so far. I'm doing OK but could do much better.

Thanks,
Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #45129
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Two pounds water or fat loss is something worth starfishs, ST. Good job.

Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #45135
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Why is the pre-picture important? For me, I had my H take them (in my swimsuit eek ) for posterity. It was on a throw-away camera and I put it in my safe but didn't develop it until I decided to try to help others with my weight-loss testimony.

The fact that those pictures were potentially available was always in the back of my mind. I was determined to create a positive comparison and it was motivation that worked for me (even though I totally understand why it might not be helpful for you.)

Also, the throw-away camera film developing technology might go away soon so that might be good or bad; good because it may help you lose faster, but bad if you lose all the weight so gradually that you can't develop the comparison pictures because they've gone the way of Kodachrome and disappeared.

As I mentioned, I will never take "AFTER" pictures. I think of them as "DURING" pictures...as in "during the rest of my life" pictures. If I meet my weight loss goal and think of it as done, I set myself up to regain all of the weight. (Yes, I've regained some of it back, but I'm glad I got a handle on it before I regained all 80 pounds!)

Regarding "The Pain of the Re-Gain," I am seeking solutions to my Emotional Eating, which is why I regained the 50 pounds. As I find these solutions, my self image and confidence will increase and our marriage will improve even more than it has already.

Thanks for being here.

Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #47777
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OK, just checking in - I have made it 5 days without sugar. I have consistently worked out for 6 days in a row - today being the 6th - at least an hour each day! This is huge for me. I will weigh myself Monday.

Had a bit of a setback. My son had all his friends over so i cooked - and of course - ate what I cooked. Lately I have been making good choices regarding vegetables and portion sizes. I had a reasonable size portion for dinner - and I felt full - but for some reason went back for more of the other stuff containing potatoes and white rice - the kids' food, basically. Need to work on the willpower part. It's hard because I have three kids, ages 10, 13, and 16, and they can eat anything and everything (and do) and remain very skinny. So I basically have to have "their" food and "my" food, but that can make it rather difficult when my cravings are particularly strong some days. I am proud to say I avoided the pizza and sodas!

We can do this!

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Raquel73] #48595
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My emotional eating is not going so well. I did my "can't eat anything" on friday and since then although i haven't been bad during the day I have been rewarding myself with choc. not as much as over the holidays but still not good.

I am enjoying decent food though, plenty of fruit and veg and smaller portions. I am feeling healthier and I am doing more walking.

IN the playground today I did powere walking and then the ministry of sill walks up and down (much to the children's and other staff's amusment)

So it's mixed news here.

Great job on the whole racquel claps It is very tricky. I do pasta if mine have friends - I don't like it, so I'm not tempted - have to hope that they eat all the garlic bread though, otherwise that can be an issue.

oh and my scales are at home, so I won't be able to weigh for the next couple of weeks - that was bad planning, cos half of me wants to hold til then.



Married 22years (this year) ~13y since dday(?)
DD17 DS14
Which way do you like yourself? ~ Stosny
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Squeaky Tree] #48755
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Here's a trick. count your carbs and keep them no higher than 100 grams. Carbs only come from berries and vegetables. However, no carrots or bananas.

Good luck to you all. My 'dieting' doesn't start till late March. Right now I'm working on adding that nice winter weight and pushing harder in the weight room to put on as much muscle as I can. I'll stop when I can't see my abs anymore smile


Some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great. I just am great. --K. Powers

Somebody may beat me, but they are going to have to bleed to do it. --Prefontaine



Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: kilted_thrower] #48785
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Texas - that narrows it a bit ...
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Texas - that narrows it a bit ...
Lol KT. I been talking to DH about your adventures. He's been on an exercising kick for the last 6 months or so, after I got him a punching bag for Father's Day. I thought I'd share one of his favorite exercising websites with you: Bodyrock.tv. He's been working on pushing himself recently.

I'm starting to join him this week once I'm over this cold.


Moi: 33
DH: Kenichi 33
M: 8/2005
DD 6 yrs
DS 3 yrs
Ze Blog
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Vibrissa] #48922
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Wellllll...share this with him.
www.t-nation.com

Ton of weight training programs and diet advice. Very large forum. There are a ton of chickas on there also...so you'd get a lot of benefit too. Don't let the first impression of the site scare y'all off. The group there tends to be a bit on the 'hardcore' side of working out.

And for dieting articles...www.bodyrecomposition.com

Speaking of adventures, I'll be flying out to Baltimore on Weds and coming back Sunday. I'll be at the annual soccer coaches conference and convention. Every night is a social gathering sponsored by Budweiser smile


Some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great. I just am great. --K. Powers

Somebody may beat me, but they are going to have to bleed to do it. --Prefontaine



Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: kilted_thrower] #48926
01/11/11 02:15 AM
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Texas - that narrows it a bit ...
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Hahaha - have fun... but not TOO much fun, if you catch my drift. I'll check out the sites and pass them on.

And soccer coaches conference! Nice. We're a soccer family - DH has visions of 12 children for his own Vib-family soccer team... I tell him fat chance....

DH is hanging our smaller punching bag for me tomorrow so we can start some workouts.

I know this is a thread more on eating, but I can say I have seen some DRAMATIC improvements in my marriage, in DHs stress and tension level as he's been working out. He is, in general, happier and easier to be around. His attitude is so much improved. Not that it was horrible before, but things have been SO much better once he started working out.

Hopefully with my efforts, it will get even better.


Moi: 33
DH: Kenichi 33
M: 8/2005
DD 6 yrs
DS 3 yrs
Ze Blog
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Vibrissa] #48984
01/11/11 03:47 AM
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Originally Posted By: Vibrissa
I know this is a thread more on eating, but I can say I have seen some DRAMATIC improvements in my marriage, in DHs stress and tension level as he's been working out. He is, in general, happier and easier to be around. His attitude is so much improved. Not that it was horrible before, but things have been SO much better once he started working out.

Hopefully with my efforts, it will get even better.


No need to apologize for posting about working out on a thread focused on how to overcome emotional eating, Vibs. I think they are highly related. When I work out, I tend to eat better. And my overall countenance improves, which may be what you're experiencing with your DH.

KT have fun at the conference while you're young and can see results of disciplined workout/eating efforts after you've relaxed a bit "til you can't see your abs anymore." FWIW I have never seen my abs, even when I was in shape and coaching dance and cheer. Well, maybe I saw them when I was pregnant but they were pretty stretched, if you know what I mean. grin

Way to go Raquel! Who hoooo! Keep it up. Glad you were able to avoid the pizza. It is tougher when you have to prepare food for a family. Put ol' Will in your front pocket. You remember Will, don't cha? He's the same Will (Power) who helped you avoid refined sugar this past week.

Stay, I can't recall where you are but maybe you could go to a gym or medical office and 'borrow' their scale if it will help you. Or maybe not.

So Vibs, you're starting a punching bag workout, eh? Now that could be very therapeutic emotionally as well as physically.

Glad to see you guys are making some progress. I did O.K. this week Not good, but not too badly. I lost 1.1% of my overall weight so that's at least in the right direction.

Ace



We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #49120
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Here's one "aversion" suggestion for how to curb your urgings to eat when your emotions threaten to take over and make you reach for chocolate:

Instead, read this thread! wink blush grin

Enjoy,
Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #50293
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I overcame an opportunity to grab food when I sorta got mad and sad yesterday.

My co-workers decided to throw a surprise party for our manager, did not get my input on the date selection and did not ask but assigned my duty and contribution amount to the gift. (We usually discuss details like this and take volunteers for who brings what, etc.)

The date they chose was yesterday, my day off which is prominently displayed on the work calendar.

I was a bit put out but decided to not get mad about it outwardly. Even if it was my vacation day, I went and was so happy that they had a leafy spinach salad that I made that my lunch and had the host put the chicken breast (and no pasta) in my salad bowl.

Thinking of this thread helped me keep my determination to NOT get mad or sad (for being somewhat disrespected). I stayed glad and did NOT grab more food.

I give this thread and all who have posted on it five stars!
starfish claps starfish thumbsup starfish dancing starfish nod starfish

Thanks!

Ace



We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: kilted_thrower] #50535
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For the last week I have only eaten very healthy food.
Food that looks like it did when it sprung from the ground
tomatoes, berries, whole rolled oat oatmeal, apples, oranges, lettuce, cucumbers, peas etc.

and meat that is not processed - chicken mostly.

no pasta, no processed anything.
small amounts of whole milk and cheese only if its unprocessed.

my body felt great...but a week in I hit this wall.
work got crazy crazy busy and I was stressed...next thing I know I have eaten a cup of trail mix, a handful of cheese its and I was pretty sure if I didn't find some chocolate somewhere there would be blood shed.

Stress to me means EAT NOW...and i get progressively more unhappy until I satisify the craving.

I had oranges and apples and craps but damn it I wanted a brownie and it was all I could think about...work is flying off the handle and I was shoveling in food as fast as I could and type with one hand.

yesterday not my best day in food control department.

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Amadahy] #51001
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Good job Acey!!!


Well done Sis, sounds like you are changing for some healthier habits.

I'm doing alright. Lots of hard work and not such good days, but I'm not rewarding myself quite so much for getting through them. Thanks again to this thread for reminding me that emotional eating is just that.

My BMI is now back in healthy range! Still several pounds to shed!


Married 22years (this year) ~13y since dday(?)
DD17 DS14
Which way do you like yourself? ~ Stosny
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Squeaky Tree] #51468
01/15/11 03:09 AM
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StayTogether, ignore the BMI.

Kinda off topic. Having a great night. Got invited to an exclusive party hosted by Puma. Then got hooked up by one of teh coaches I'm bunking with to an Adidas eat/greet/drink party.

then went downstairs to teh awards banquent. I finally got bored and came back to teh hotel room. Waiting for them to finish to go out. You know, Baltimore is pretty cool. I really like the look of this town.

But I'm homesick also


Some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great. I just am great. --K. Powers

Somebody may beat me, but they are going to have to bleed to do it. --Prefontaine



Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: kilted_thrower] #51582
01/15/11 02:36 PM
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Originally Posted By: kilted_thrower
StayTogether, ignore the BMI.

Assuming that BMI stands for Body Mass Index, I have two questions:

How do you measure this, ST?

Why do you say to ignore BMI, KT?


Kinda off topic. Having a great night. Got invited to an exclusive party hosted by Puma. Then got hooked up by one of teh coaches I'm bunking with to an Adidas eat/greet/drink party.

then went downstairs to teh awards banquent. I finally got bored and came back to teh hotel room. Waiting for them to finish to go out. You know, Baltimore is pretty cool. I really like the look of this town.

But I'm homesick also

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{KT}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
When do you get to go home?


Sounds like an interesting conference, KT. Does your wife ever travel with you? I know that having many kids makes this difficult but it could help alleviate your being homesick.

I have another overcoming emotional eating story but will put it on my blog first where I have more time to edit.

Thanks to everyone who is (and considering) posting on this thread.

Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #51625
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BMI stands for body mass index. You put your weight, height and boom...you're grouped into being okay, fat, obese, etc. With my weight and height and being in single digit bodyfat...I was counted as being very overweight, borderline obese. It's just not a very reliable assessment of if one is where they need/should be. That's my reasons for saying what I said in a nutshell.

Getting a bodyfat percentage test is a lot more reliable.

As far as teh conference, I fly back home on Sunday. My family doesn't come because although my wife likes soccer, she doesn't like it enough to sit in and watch clinics and whatnot for 3-4 days. We also have a 2 year old that doesn't sleep well at all if not in his crib...basically he needs a bed with bars. And with her mother in law not having a car, we don't feel safe leaving the kids without transportation for more than a day at a time.

She will prob go with me next year since the youngest will be old enough to sleep ina regular bed, it'll be only 3-4 hours away from home, and a couple of the other coaches wives are going so she won't be bored.

The conference is really sweet. There's a social gathering every night and if you like to drink, it's free alcohol. During the day you sit in meetings for different topics or field demonstrations watching college and professional coaches do drill demonstrations so that you get exposed to a lot of new stuff. The school district considers this professional development for me. And I get to social network which enables me to get more opportunities for advancement should I choose or for scholarships for my athletes.

Last year I really didn't notice the homesickness because we didn't leave till thursday and we were back really late Sat. we left a day earlier this time and coming back on Sunday.

This place is packed. There's a bit over 7500 coaches here from all over teh US.


Some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great. I just am great. --K. Powers

Somebody may beat me, but they are going to have to bleed to do it. --Prefontaine



Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: kilted_thrower] #51651
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OOOOhhhh

KT, I'm not going to get a body fat percentage test....it comes out horribly yucky. I much prefer BMI - it works nicely for me

Actually I think I prob did the body fat thing when I was 3.5 stone heavier, than when I was at my lowest. It probably wouldn't be too horrific now.

I could do it. My sister has scales that that send a pulse round you and calculate it.


Married 22years (this year) ~13y since dday(?)
DD17 DS14
Which way do you like yourself? ~ Stosny
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #51671
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Well, I didn't do so hot this week. Beginning of the week was good, but Thursday and Friday I broke down and had a piece of cake at a going away party for one of our employees who is leaving the company. I missed a couple of exercise sessions because I was just very tired. I notice this tends to0 happen about a week or so before my period. I guess hormones or something, but I tend to get hungry and crave all the bad stuff. Not good. Trying to keep my resolve today and not eat sugar, sticking to veggies, fruit and protein like eggs and fish.

My daughter has been doing a wonderful job getting her homework done every day so I am going to take her out for some Mother-daughter time. I've been having to enroll my oldest son in the nearby high school. I don't mean to offend anyone who lives in California, but the California public school system is just pathetic! Transfers and ppw were much easier in Texas, and the schools were wayyyyyy better. California ranks about 48th or 49th nationwide in the US and it is very obvious when you have a conversation with anyone under the age of 30.I finally got my kids into a decent school system which everyone raves about how good it is, but this school would just be considered the norm in Texas. That's my one complaint about this area. Oh well, we have to make the best of what we have.

OK, today is a new day! I can do this!

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Raquel73] #51722
01/15/11 09:20 PM
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Originally Posted By: Raquel73
OK, today is a new day! I can do this!


Hey Raquel,

You're not alone! WE are all doing this together.

hug dancing highfive hug dancing hug highfive

Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Squeaky Tree] #51730
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Originally Posted By: staytogether
I could do it. My sister has scales that that send a pulse round you and calculate it.


Eh. Skip that. It won't be accurate. For example step on it. Now go run for 10 minutes and drink 20 ounces of water, suddenly you're bodyfat is 8 percent lower or higher. Just wait till you're ready and ahve a trainer use calipers.


Some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great. I just am great. --K. Powers

Somebody may beat me, but they are going to have to bleed to do it. --Prefontaine



Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: kilted_thrower] #51741
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The Castle Aaaggghh...
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The Castle Aaaggghh...
They will be doing a body fat percentage on me Monday. And again, I won't be posting it here.....y'all will just havta wait for the "after" pics smile

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #55374
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Well, I don't know if I actually have lost anything, but a friend told me I was looking thinner. Nice ego boost.

I'm still struggling over portion sizes. Why is this so hard to overcome? I'm not really craving sugar like I used to or any particular item, but I just want to eat and eat til I'm stuffed.

Exercising is going great, though. But I've never had an issue exercising (except time restrictions)- I actually like it. I have a lot of muscle. But if I continue exercising and eating large portions like this I'm just going to look like a bulldog.

A neighbor is giving me their table - they got a new one and didn't want this one, so I get it. It's really nice and mine is ugly and the chairs are falling apart. These enighbors are quite well off. They are delivering it Friday then we are going to hang out and talk a while. She has the opposite problem - she used to be underweight and had issues with eating enough. Takes thyroid meds for it but still has to force herself to eat.

I got a compliment from my boss today and he gave me a gift certificate for the good job I've been doing lately. Just found out our company is the 2nd larger exporter of almonds in the state of California, after Blue Diamond. My boss built this company in three years! (He came from Blue Diamond). He has also climbed the tallest mountain on each continent - including Mt. Everest. He is amazing. Really puts our accomplishments in perspective.

My daughter wants me - what a great kid! laugh1

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Raquel73] #55434
01/21/11 02:34 PM
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Originally Posted By: Raquel73
Well, I don't know if I actually have lost anything, but a friend told me I was looking thinner. Nice ego boost.

I'm still struggling over portion sizes. Why is this so hard to overcome? I'm not really craving sugar like I used to or any particular item, but I just want to eat and eat til I'm stuffed.


Congratulations, Raquel!

I have 3 words of encouragement (or is it "encouragment"...that doesn't look right either). Oh well ~~~ 3 words of support:

Patience.
Persistence.
Pre-Planning.

You've had your portion habits for years so it will take time and patience (and pre-planning) to change them.

Even if you don't see immediate results, take pride in the compliments people pay you and journal about them. If there is a time lapse between them, re-read your journal entries to help you endure the lags.

I keep a kettle of hot water on the range when I'm home. Drinking hot, cold or tepid water is helpful for all aspects of weight control and overall health. The only drawback is drinking too much late in the day and having sleep interruptions to "pee away the pounds." LOL blush But you can get a full feeling by drinking water in advance of meals, especially when going out for meals.

Speaking of going out, try to order from the children's meals menu. Then eat slowly so you'll finish with others.

At home, can you find a way to pre-plan your meals with portion control in mind? One thing that helped me was forcing myself to snack. I keep a bag of dry-roasted unsalted almonds in my desk drawer. No kidding...I'm supporting the almond industry (get mine at Trader Joes).

Maybe you can eat a limited portion meal before the kids and assign one of them the chore of clearing the table and storing leftovers to minimize your temptations. Once you get the habit changed, this may not be needed but it could give you a good start.

For me, one reason I eat multiple small portions (you know...just one that becomes just one-plus 10 more later) is because of my emotions. I have to physically stop my hand from going to my mouth with the forbidden 'extra portion' enclosed or indulged on.

Sometimes I throw it away with force. Other times, when that wasn't so successful, I have to spit it out into the garbage can after one chew.

Like changing any habit, this is a slow tedious process, which is why I'm so glad you're willing to post your journey. I'm on the same slow process and I hope a few of my ideas help you as much as your candor and honesty are helping me.

Thanks!
Ace


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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #57973
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NOT a good day.......

Son 13 has not been doing any homework since returning from Christmas break except math. He had rows of zero's. The week long camping/field trip for which we actually got a scholarship for him from the PTA is in jeopardy. If he doesn't turn in assignments for the next week, he will not be able to go. It is an awesome opportunity - a campout with the whole 6th grade class at a special camp in San Francisco, they get to meet with naturalists and learn about tetonic plates and nature and redwood forests, etc. They never had stuff like this when I was a kid.

So apparently, if I actually want to workout, I will have to do it really, really early in the morning (5 AM - yuck) or lunchtime at work, because my evening hours have to be spent making sure he does his homework like he's a first-grader. I took the X-box, cell phone, TV, and movies away - all he can do is read. ALSO, I really hate grade-school homework. I know it comes with territory of being a mom, but I really hate helping with gradeschool homework or having to listen to them read to me. I really have to force myself to sit and be patient becasue there is about a million other things I can think of I need to be doing.

Does anyone else feel like this burden moms have is completely unfair? I know I'm supposed to be accepting of my life as a single mom, but I just get really irritated at society's expectations - as a woman, gotta work full-time, have all the responsibilities of a stay at home, all the housework, all the homework, all the appointments, and then we're supposed be dressed well and have great figures and never sleep or something. And when something goes wrong - bad grades, kids on drugs - it's our fault. Not the dad's - always the moms. Even when I was married it was like this. And the guys can just walk out, see their kids twice a year, and have a bimbo living with them a week later feeling sorry for them becasue they never see the kids and pay so much in child support.

Okay, venting over.....just a bad day. Any one with advice for a kid with a bad attitude (he's 13, remember), homework struggles, and has a very hard time with reading.

Thanks!

Last edited by Raquel73; 01/25/11 05:06 AM. Reason: misspelled word
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Raquel73] #58032
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Raquel73

I have enjoyed reading your success story thread.
Quote:

Any one with advice for a kid with a bad attitude (he's 13, remember), homework struggles, and has a very hard time with reading.


Ah the middle school years. I too had a hard time in reading when I was his age. (several years behind) I have a couple of questions first:

Is the homework too hard or is it something that he should be able to do?

If the homework is something that he can do then IMO he is making a choice not to do it. If that is the case then is he old enough to deal with the consequences of his choice? (i.e. lower grade, not going on Field trip, etc.) As he gets older he will have to make more and more choices that get increasingly complex with higher risks. IMO you have to decide if his consequence may teach him the value of doing what is expected of him. Just my POV as both a parent and an educator.

As parents we can make life very difficult (taking things from them)for our children but I do not believe that we can MAKE them do anything when they are dead set against it.

If the homework is truly too hard for him then that is a discussion to have with his teacher(s). See if there is a way to assist him in completing it. IMO homework should reinforce something that he has already learned in the classroom from his teacher(s). If that is not happening then check into any assistance that can be offered in the classroom.

Again these are my POVs and take them for just that. . . my 2 cents.

Good luck, and again thank you for sharing your success.

W2W

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Raquel73] #58043
01/25/11 01:17 PM
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Hi Raquel,

I agree with W2W and am glad for his educator/parent perspective. I have a few additional thoughts I'll share in teal below:

Originally Posted By: Raquel73
NOT a good day.......

Son 13 has not been doing any homework since returning from Christmas break except math. He had rows of zero's. The week long camping/field trip for which we actually got a scholarship for him from the PTA is in jeopardy. If he doesn't turn in assignments for the next week, he will not be able to go. It is an awesome opportunity - a campout with the whole 6th grade class at a special camp in San Francisco, they get to meet with naturalists and learn about tetonic plates and nature and redwood forests, etc. They never had stuff like this when I was a kid.

I totally get why you want him to go on the camping trip. Does he want to go? Is the school making the decision that he can't go if he doesn't turn in assignments or is that your condition? I ask because if he's lost motivation for reasons you are not yet aware, removing this privilege will make no difference.

So apparently, if I actually want to workout, I will have to do it really, really early in the morning (5 AM - yuck) or lunchtime at work, because my evening hours have to be spent making sure he does his homework like he's a first-grader.

I hear your resentment, Raquel and I'm sorry you have such limited choices. Can you workout during lunch hour (maybe splitting your lunch into two larger snacks mid-morning and mid-afternoon) 3 days a week? Or if you did it Tues., Thurs. & Sat. it's only 2 days out of your work week...might that work?

I took the X-box, cell phone, TV, and movies away - all he can do is read. ALSO, I really hate grade-school homework. I know it comes with territory of being a mom, but I really hate helping with gradeschool homework or having to listen to them read to me. I really have to force myself to sit and be patient because there is about a million other things I can think of I need to be doing.

It's good that you recognize this but what options do you have to alleviate this irritation? For me, I find a way to change my attitude and try to concentrate on the privilege related to the challenging situation. In other words, if I hate ironing, I start thinking about the stories I hear about the old days when you had to heat the metal in the fire and always got ashes on the clothes you were ironing....or burned yourself....or needed a hour to iron one item. As I concentrate on how blessed I am to have an electric steam iron that only takes a minute to heat up, is clean, quick, safe ~ within reason ~ and efficient, I still hate to iron but changing my perspective makes it bearable.

When it came to doing kid-school-type-duties, if/when I ever got resentful, I began counting blessings that my son or daughter represented in my life. Our kids were fairly good students so this is not a fair comparison. But when I found myself having to work on my patience during those challenging "school work" times, I forced myself to think about the time when they would be gone and I would not have this privilege of one-on-one time with them. That helped me change my attitude about the 'chore' and also increased my bonding and intimacy with the child. They're out of college and on their own now but we remain very close.

Like I said, not a fair comparison (my H also helped with fair to great students) but it worked for me to try to create positive mind games when needed to help endure a difficult but necessary task.


Does anyone else feel like this burden moms have is completely unfair? I know I'm supposed to be accepting of my life as a single mom, but I just get really irritated at society's expectations - as a woman, gotta work full-time, have all the responsibilities of a stay at home, all the housework, all the homework, all the appointments, and then we're supposed be dressed well and have great figures and never sleep or something. And when something goes wrong - bad grades, kids on drugs - it's our fault. Not the dad's - always the moms. Even when I was married it was like this. And the guys can just walk out, see their kids twice a year, and have a bimbo living with them a week later feeling sorry for them becasue they never see the kids and pay so much in child support.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{[Raquel & family}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

While I have never experienced anything like you are, I feel your pain. You are doing a magnificent job and these challenges are temporary setbacks that can be overcome. (I hate the trite cliche' but will repeat it anyhow: "Challenges build character." ) I know...I know...not exactly what you want to hear. But it is true. Next time, you'll be in a better position to handle it due to successfully dealing with this situation.


Okay, venting over.....just a bad day. Any one with advice for a kid with a bad attitude (he's 13, remember), homework struggles, and has a very hard time with reading.

Thanks!


So glad you vented, Raquel. You're welcome to stay and vent all you want on this thread. Another thought, however might be to start a venting thread on the Divorce forum where other single parents might be able to see/relate to your situation more than over on this forum. OR you can start a thread over there but put a link to this thread regarding your healthy habits/eating issues. If you keep your single parenting/school/homework/discipline challenges on that forum, I'm guessing you'll get lots of input. I will check that forum more if you choose to do that. BUT like I said, you're totally welcome to stay on this thread for any issues you may want to vent about or to get related input.

Thanks for being here. While your challenges are difficult, your willingness to share is inspiring to many, including me!

Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #58725
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Well, today was better. I got up and worked out at 5 AM. I had a lot of energy right after too! Did some laundry, got the kids up for school and all that. Felt good. I think I will continue this. dancing

Regarding son - I really appreciate the advice. He is my middle child. My oldest (Son 16) was one of those who is extremely brilliant and everything is very easy for him. It probably really sucks to have an older brother like that. My own brother is brilliant - genius smart - and I always had to deal with comments throughout high school like "Not as smart as her brother but definitely cuter." Used to make me so mad!However, when my oldest was 13, he went through a phase where he did not want to do anything and almost didn't pass eighth grade because of it. I threatened to take everything away if he didn't pull it together. He didn't - so he lost his computer, Wii, cell phone, TV, I pod - everything except books the entire summer. He got nothing back until I saw his 9th grade report card. There has not been an issue with grades since.

But middle son is different. He excels in math, but has always struggled with reading. It stressed him out so much in first grade, and after much discussion and agonizing, the teacher and I made the decision to hold him back in first grade. He was already a late child (November birthday) so he is one of the oldest kids in the class - which is why he is a 13-year old 6th grader. He has never had an issue making friends, though - he is always one of the most popular boys. He loves sports and is extremely competitive and quite the jock, if I do say so myself. However, being held back was a blow to his self-esteem and then 2nd and 3rd grade were the years when my ex was having the affair and we seperated, divorced, and moved halfway across the country. My ex and I were so self-absorbed in our own problems the kids got completely overlooked. He does not have a learning disability but reading is definitely hard work for him and there were 2 years when he needed competent parents to assist him and we weren't there for him. Also, he does not adjust well to change, and those past years were pretty stressful on him. But we have a good home now, it's stable, and I plan to stay until the youngest graduates high school. I just need to get him up to speed.

So, he read to me last night. It's not as bad as I thought. He and I talked - he said he just needs help with his homework. So I will sit with him every night and help him. I am also going to talk to a friend at church - he is a psychologist who helped me with the kids when we first moved here. He gave us free counseling and he and his wife have kind of taken the kids under their wing (great support and people at my church!). I'll see what he recommends.

You are right, though - you can't make kids do homework when they are dead set against it. My parents tried everything and my brother and I didn't do ours. Payin' for my raisin', maybe?!

Thanks for listening and all the advice!

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Raquel73] #59366
01/27/11 06:53 AM
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Thanks for the update, Raquel. Wow! What a difference a day makes. claps

I'll just bet....uh....I'll bet it went better because you got up at 5 AM to work out! Right?????? eek

Good for you!

Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #59441
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I just (8 pounds) wanted to drop by (8 pounds) on the 9th day of my diet (8 pounds) and say hello. Guess how much I've lost?

Oh, you say? You don't know but would love for me to tell you, you say?

8 pounds!!!!!

39 to go. I can have fruit and veggies now. I don't think I've ever been so happy to munch down on a piece of celery.

That's 8, people.

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: herfuturesbright] #60224
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Originally Posted By: heremainsfaithful
I just (8 pounds) wanted to drop by (8 pounds) on the 9th day of my diet (8 pounds) and say hello. Guess how much I've lost?

Oh, you say? You don't know but would love for me to tell you, you say?

8 pounds!!!!!

39 to go. I can have fruit and veggies now. I don't think I've ever been so happy to munch down on a piece of celery.

That's 8, people.


claps thumbsup dancingThat's GR8, HRF! Way to go!

Keep up the focus and thanks for the update.

Have you ever been an emotional eater?

What an inspiration! I'd be curious as to how your plan deals with plateaus (when you're doing everything right but the weight loss stops due to a variety of reasons). Has anything been mentioned about that possibility?

Anyone else have tips for how to overcome a resistance plateau?

Again, kudos to you. I can't post during daytime work hours but will continue to check in evenings and mornings. Please continue to share your progress here.

Thanks,
Ace



We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #60802
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A good metabolic cleanse jump starts weight loss or helps you to get beyond a plateau. wink


God's Blessings,

Say

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Saynomore] #61444
01/30/11 02:41 PM
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Originally Posted By: Saynomore
A good metabolic cleanse jump starts weight loss or helps you to get beyond a plateau. wink


God's Blessings,

Say


Sounds intriguing, Say. I wonder how it compares (or contrasts) with the Metabolic Tune-up researched at Baylor University.

Can you provide a link to your program or at least a list of foods that make it work?

Maybe the two concepts can work together and benefit all healthwise whether or not one is an emotional eater.

Thanks,
Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #61559
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Goodness Gracious!!!! Congratulations HRF!!! wowee... I'm so jealous and feeling such a slacker.

(hence my absence from here) I will get back on it and I will be a good girl soon, soon, soon


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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Squeaky Tree] #66292
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I'm doing much better in keeping my emotions in check and making better food choices. I'm also formulating some ideas of how and why and will post them soon.

How's everyone else doing with emotional eating challenges?

Acie


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #66328
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oh man, oh man. I am doing absolutely awfully. I don't why. Maybe it's because my wobbly bits are getting wobblier

and I keep telling myself to fill up lots at meal times, so that I'm not hungry later, but I'm still snacking out badly and essentially having little binges.

I don't recall doing this before and I'm not unhappy....I am working hard though (not working out, still not allowed to do that) but I just want scrummy confort food all da, every day.

What shall I do?????? Help!!!!!! I can't even talk myself out of it....I want to keep eating.


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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Squeaky Tree] #66376
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Texas - that narrows it a bit ...
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Texas - that narrows it a bit ...
What is your water intake like stay?

What snacks do you keep available? If you know you are going to be snacking, perhaps you can stock up on healthy snacks and get rid of the less good choices. You won't stop the snacking, but at least if you have better stuff it's better than junk.

Plus if it is less tempting, you'll be less tempted to eat it!


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M: 8/2005
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #66854
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We purchase the cleanse kit from a company called Advocare. Basically you are required to eat 8 to 10 servings of fruits and vegetables a day while eliminating sugar, fats, whites, (rice, bread, potatoes, pasta)and alcohol. We just finished the ten day claeanse last Wednesday and I am basically still avoiding all of the "forbidden" foods.

I lost five lbs, DH lost thirteen. The best part though is that I feel amazing. My energy level has increased, I'm sleeping better, my cravings are gone and my appetite is under control.

We have been slacking on it for the last year but are going to resume regular cleanses every three to four months. I would be glad to post an e-mail for my distributor if anyone is interested. It is cheaper through him.

God's Blessings,

Say

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Saynomore] #66918
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Vib

I have been trying to up my fluid intake. I didn't kid myself by eating larger meals today, but I did do the chocolate bings.

The choc thing...it's not like I'm snacking, I just want to eat chocolate.

Say (good to see you about) I'm interested in the cleanse kit. I wonder if there are UK distributors?

ST

St



Married 22years (this year) ~13y since dday(?)
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Which way do you like yourself? ~ Stosny
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Squeaky Tree] #67032
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Thanks, Stay. I don't hang out too much. smirk Send me a PM and I will shoot you his E-mail addy. In the mean time go to www.advocare.com and look up Herbal Cleanse. It has been a God send for me over the last few years. It makes you really conscious of what you eat and the monetary expenditure keeps ya honest.

God's Blessings,

Say

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Saynomore] #67062
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Texas - that narrows it a bit ...
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I get the Chocolate thing ST - I've started munching on Chocolate Cheerios when the craving hits me. A serving is only 100 calories and at least it's some whole wheat and vitamins as well. I'm really low on milk intake, normally so a bit with cereal is good for me and I'll throw in some fresh fruit while I'm at it.

Had the opportunity to emotionally eat today. Got a rejection from the job I interviewed with last week. Made it to a second interview, but no offer. Was feeling really down and DH was all ready to go get me a cheeseburger to cheer me up. I was VERY tempted, but I said no. Small victories!

Last edited by Vibrissa; 02/09/11 03:30 AM.

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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #67122
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Well, I went on a major binge last week. Felt awful yesterday and finally got up and exercised today. I met with a friend and we are going to try some new stuff together. She was from the Midwest (like me) and used to be overweight and is now very slender. She knows the whole overeating issues very well. I just wish there was a pill I could take when I get the cravings and desire to stuff myself that makes me FEEL full. I said this out loud and a coworker said "drink more water and you will feel more full." I just get super annoyed when people say stuff like this, or "eat less and burn more calories than you consume, it's that simple." Right - it's that simple. By golly, why didn't I think of that before? What a moron I must be. Should've dropped 100 lbs by now, that's so simple.

Does anyone else get annoyed with the "good advice" regarding weight loss?


Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Raquel73] #67132
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Who are you annoyed with Raquel? Yourself or them?

I used to get annoyed, but then I lost about 45lb and realised how true it was.

I've put 14lb back on.

I think I just accept. I know it's a case of calories in vs calories out. I know when I did lose lots of weight I had a mug of decaff coffee on the go all day.

And I know I am choosing to make bad choices now.

THis morning I have a lemon and ginger infusion, and a decaff coffee and I'm going to try to get in a glass of OJ before I go to work tooo (and it's a really long way from the classsroom I work in to the staff loo).

I'll take a cuppa soup to work to have at morning break, because I'm not going to get chance for lunch. And then try to avoid my ususally wednesday feeling sorry for myself because I didn't get a lunch break andnot walk to the shop to treat myself for being so hard working!


Married 22years (this year) ~13y since dday(?)
DD17 DS14
Which way do you like yourself? ~ Stosny
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Squeaky Tree] #67154
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Originally Posted By: staytogether
oh man, oh man. I am doing absolutely awfully. I don't why. Maybe it's because my wobbly bits are getting wobblier

and I keep telling myself to fill up lots at meal times, so that I'm not hungry later, but I'm still snacking out badly and essentially having little binges.

I don't recall doing this before and I'm not unhappy....I am working hard though (not working out, still not allowed to do that) but I just want scrummy confort food all da, every day.

What shall I do?????? Help!!!!!! I can't even talk myself out of it....I want to keep eating.


Here's what worked for me as I was losing 80 pounds over 5 years (2002 - 2007).

In addition to talking myself out of it, I saw myself out of it (and occasionally 'felt' my way out of it).

I created visual impressions using past pictures of me at healthy weights. I made a collage of all these pics and put it in a plastic holder in my daytimer.

Yes, it can be irritating, but more times than not, it serves as a deterrent and helps you talk yourself out of it when something challenges you.

This goes well with new goals you can feel (like how a certain size feels when you can snap/zip/button them on). What are your goals, ST? Have you written them down?

After I lost the weight, I created a DVD detailing my steps, which I am compiling to post here .... soon.

When I followed them, I lost weight. When I didn't, I gained. Just like marital recovery or personal recovery, healthy recovery is a rollercoaster that is usually governed by our choices. For me, my healthy recovery is directly related to our marital recovery. More later.

Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Vibrissa] #67163
02/09/11 01:56 PM
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Originally Posted By: Vibrissa
What is your water intake like stay?

What snacks do you keep available? If you know you are going to be snacking, perhaps you can stock up on healthy snacks and get rid of the less good choices. You won't stop the snacking, but at least if you have better stuff it's better than junk.

Plus if it is less tempting, you'll be less tempted to eat it!


I agree with Vibs that water intake is the key to healthy habits for a myriad of reasons:

1) Hydration is imperative for maximum digestion and all excess fat eventually is eliminated via water in some form. blush

2) Water creates a feeling of being full, possibly helping in wise choices when temptation arises.

3) Water is relatively inexpensive. For those who hate drinking water, it could be because of the unknown contents in tap water. I hated wter when growing up (high lime content) and used to have a Brita filter but recently bought a ZeroWater filter. Amazing. Family members who previously did not like water now do.

I agree with Vibs that snacks are a controllable option. Buying the family snacks that you DON'T like might help in this aspect. Getting healthy snacks that you and your family like is better but not always possible.

Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Saynomore] #67168
02/09/11 02:01 PM
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Originally Posted By: Saynomore
We purchase the cleanse kit from a company called Advocare. Basically you are required to eat 8 to 10 servings of fruits and vegetables a day while eliminating sugar, fats, whites, (rice, bread, potatoes, pasta)and alcohol. We just finished the ten day claeanse last Wednesday and I am basically still avoiding all of the "forbidden" foods.

I lost five lbs, DH lost thirteen. The best part though is that I feel amazing. My energy level has increased, I'm sleeping better, my cravings are gone and my appetite is under control.

We have been slacking on it for the last year but are going to resume regular cleanses every three to four months. I would be glad to post an e-mail for my distributor if anyone is interested. It is cheaper through him.

God's Blessings,

Say


Thanks for sharing that, Say. (I still think you should change your name to "SayMore" because you have great things to say!) Congratulations to you and your DH for your continued success.

I'm going to check out your link as this sounds like a great way to increase metabolism. I've always thought I could not do anything about having a slow metabolism but it's nice to know that it is within one's control.

Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Vibrissa] #67172
02/09/11 02:11 PM
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Originally Posted By: Vibrissa
Had the opportunity to emotionally eat today. Got a rejection from the job I interviewed with last week. Made it to a second interview, but no offer. Was feeling really down and DH was all ready to go get me a cheeseburger to cheer me up. I was VERY tempted, but I said no. Small victories!


{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Vibs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

HUGE Victory IMO. Glad you resisted. Did he get himself a cheeseburger? If my H had offered that, I might have suggested he bring home a take-out c-burger but I might have asked for the last bite! LOL

So sorry for your job disappointment. Better opportunities are around the horizon. It was great practice for you and making it to the second interview is something to be proud of. I know it's not much consolation but put on your rose-colored glasses for a moment: You get to spend a little more time with your delightful DD. smile

Ace




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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Raquel73] #67176
02/09/11 02:22 PM
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Originally Posted By: Raquel73
Well, I went on a major binge last week. Felt awful yesterday and finally got up and exercised today. I met with a friend and we are going to try some new stuff together. She was from the Midwest (like me) and used to be overweight and is now very slender. She knows the whole overeating issues very well. I just wish there was a pill I could take when I get the cravings and desire to stuff myself that makes me FEEL full. I said this out loud and a coworker said "drink more water and you will feel more full." I just get super annoyed when people say stuff like this, or "eat less and burn more calories than you consume, it's that simple." Right - it's that simple. By golly, why didn't I think of that before? What a moron I must be. Should've dropped 100 lbs by now, that's so simple.

Does anyone else get annoyed with the "good advice" regarding weight loss?



{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Raquel}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Yes, I was often annoyed with people "trying to help who oversimplified stuff" so I commiserate with you in that respect.

When I first started losing weight, I never said anything to anyone. I flew under the radar for weeks and after a couple months, someone commented that I looked like I was losing weight. I quietly said "Thanks" but did not ask/offer anything else.

I vaguely recalled that a concept from a motivational workshop years ago that encouraged only sharing your goals with people who you can trust to help you meet them. That takes discipline, too but may eliminate some frustrations.

Two more things:

The concepts may be simple but weight loss/maintenance is never easy.

What may seem simple/easy for one person may be difficult for me.

Glad you posted your frustration, Raquel. I'm sure others are dealing with the same thing.

Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #67222
02/09/11 04:04 PM
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Texas - that narrows it a bit ...
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Thanks Ace - yeah I am grateful for more time with DD. It was a bit of a blow, but something will work out, somehow, and I'm feeling better about it today. DH didn't get the cheeseburger either. I was in the middle of making dinner and REALLY wanted it, but we stuck to our dinner (Beef Pot Pie) and it was tasty.

Quote:
only sharing your goals with people who you can trust to help you meet them.


I really like this.

I agree with ya on weightloss not being easy. I think a lot of times people don't understand how to validate and support each other. When you were upset, Raquel, your coworker may have been wanting to help you, but didn't know how. I heard some pretty insensitive things when I had my miscarriage, but I knew the people that said them meant well, they were trying to be helpful. They weren't really sure how to handle something negative, but they wanted to be caring. Validation and Sympathy are just not skills most people are taught, and it takes practice to use them. When someone tells me something that is frustrating, when I believe they are trying to be helpful, I TRY to take in the SPIRIT of what they are trying to do, and focus less on the words.

I'm not great at it. I get upset about things people tell me quite a bit. But I don't want to be offended all the time.

I understand where you were at. You get SO hungry, you just want to be FULL, but the things you KNOW will fill you you also know are bad for you - you feel stuck, because you want to be healthy but you don't want to be starving. I've lived like that the last year (thank you breastfeeding), and nothing seemed to work. I know it's hard. You know things that you can do to help, baby steps and you'll get there.


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M: 8/2005
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #67231
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Losing weight is very difficult, Rachel, especially the older we get. It involves stopping bad habits and creating good ones. I don't know about you but that is really, really difficult for me.

I always try to listen to what has worked for other people even knowing that it may not work for me. You have to find the things that stimulate your will power and make you feel good. Drinking lots of water is probably the one thing that is universal when you talk to folks who have taken the weight off but it is certainly no miracle cure. You can drink tons of water and continue to overeat and it just stretches your stomache and enables you to eat more. (-:

When I have lost it and overeaten or just eaten things that I know are really bad for my metabolism (SUGAR)I fast for 36 hours. It clears my head and shrinks my stomache and helps me to regain control. I don't do it often but it has helped me to keep off the 25 lbs that I lost five years ago. Will that work for you? Maybe but first it has to work in your head.

The bottom line is that in order to lose weight, you must burn up more caloires than you take in. Over simplistic? Sure but that does not make it untrue. It is up to you to find out how your personality can accomplish that most successfully. Support like this thread is really helpful to me.

Good job on the control, Vibs and )-: on the job. I know that God has something really special in mind for you but it is so hard to wait on His timing.

Thanks, Ace.

God's Blessings,

Say

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #67480
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Staytogether, I'm annoyed at both myself and the other people!

I'm annoyed at myself because this seems to defeat me - everytime! I have been through so much in my life - dysfunctional childhood, 3 kids, difficult marriage and horrible, affair ending divorce, and I have persevered. I did not become an alcoholic or drug addict, or any other destructive roads in which someone in my circumstances might have easily chosen. I've always prided myself on being strong, independent, and intelligent. I am in a good place in life right now - except for this weight issue. It's the last hurdle and it's a big one. I had only 4 good years, ages 16 - 20, that I had a great body. I am 5'5 and at that time I was about 130 lbs. Now I am 240 lbs. I got pregnant at age 20, and it all just went downhill from there. I gained weight, a lot, and I have never been able to get it off. It increased with each kid. I'm not lazy - I actually like to exercise. Between the 2nd and 3rd kid, I was doing Tai Kwan Do, Karate Club, and aerobics almost every day (I was in college at the time). I was about 180 lbs then. I never lost a pound - and that was in the span of two years. My friends were amazed - my girlfriend's husband, who had put on quite a bit of weight, was working out at the same time I was and we would often go to the gym together. He lost all his weight. I didn't lose a thing. He was astounded because he knew how hard I worked. I could do 20 push-ups, male style, on my knuckles on the harwood floor. But I still ate a lot, so apparently exercise means nothing. The only time I ever lost weight was on the infidelity diet; that was about 50 lbs but I wasn't hardly eating at all, I wasn't sleeping, and I was a neurotic mess.

I get annoyed with other people because a lot of times they are people who have never had to struggle with this issue, but they know exactly what I should be doing. My brother is really bad - the men in my family tend to be very skinny no matter what they eat (and they eat a lot!) - until about age 35, then they start gaining weight. My brother only recently had this issue - he has always been the most unsympathetic person towards anyone with weight issues. Plus, he's in the Army, so he always exercise. Plus, he has a stay-at-home wife who worships the ground he walks on and takes care of everything like housewrk and kids so he has plenty of time to exercise. So, he actually put on some pounds for the 1st time in his entire life, but then cut out all sugar and carbs and started running everyday and lost 25 lbs in one month. Was it wrong of me to think "that a$$hole!?"

Some things I do know: biology isn't fair. I am just one of those people who has to work twice as hard to get half the results. I will never give up and just let it go! I may rant and rave, and I may fall off the wagon from time to time, but I won't give up. I'm going to try this plan my friend is suggesting - it's for about three months. It's not cheap, but I just got a raise so I think I can invest in myself a bit.

Anyway, thanks for listening and I appreciate all your support!

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Raquel73] #67567
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Two words...
Tape Worm

That's right! Just chuck some of them bad boys down into the gut and you'll be losing weight in no time!

Stay tuned for my new e-book coming out shortly, "Tape Worms, Weightloss, and You."

p.s. When you feel hungry, drink water. Typically when we have partial dehydration, we feel hunger but it's really thirst.


Some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great. I just am great. --K. Powers

Somebody may beat me, but they are going to have to bleed to do it. --Prefontaine



Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: kilted_thrower] #67570
02/10/11 03:06 AM
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Texas - that narrows it a bit ...
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Texas - that narrows it a bit ...
.... WHY DID I NEVER THINK OF THAT!?!?!??!

...I need a tapeworm...


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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Vibrissa] #67574
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Wait.

I'll have a package deal coming out soon that will include an instruction manual, a testimonial DVD, and a set of tape worms.

p.s. I was starting to feel silly for still wearing my ball caps backwards since I'm 33. But Cosmo told me that I'm good to go till I'm 40. So on my 40th birthday, I shall turn my cap around!

Last edited by kilted_thrower; 02/10/11 03:11 AM.

Some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great. I just am great. --K. Powers

Somebody may beat me, but they are going to have to bleed to do it. --Prefontaine



Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: kilted_thrower] #67649
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Originally Posted By: kilted_thrower
Wait.

I'll have a package deal coming out soon that will include an instruction manual, a testimonial DVD, and a set of tape worms.


A set????? eek eek

One tape worm squiggling around, eatin' and poopin' around my innards is bad enough, but a SET?????

How long does it take for them to create mini-tape wormS? shocked shocked shocked


Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #67651
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Eat a rancid chicken. The resulting vomiting and diarrhoea should have you shedding pounds like there's no tomorrow.

Now, do you feel better about the tape worms?

I wonder how hard it is to get thru NZ customs with a tapeworm?


AKA Lildoggie

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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Lil] #67716
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Originally Posted By: lildoggie
Eat a rancid chicken. The resulting vomiting and diarrhoea should have you shedding pounds like there's no tomorrow.

Now, do you feel better about the tape worms?

I wonder how hard it is to get thru NZ customs with a tapeworm?


If there are any soccer conferences or weight training competitions in NZ, maybe KT can find out if his tape worms can pass NZ customs. If not, I can see the YouTube video headline.
Click to reveal..
"World Class Weight Trainer's Tape Worms
Overtake Customs Agent in NZ Airport!"

laugh1 grin ROFL


Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #67914
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I like Ace's idea. I'll branch out into making it a movie about large tape worms infesting New Zealand.


Some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great. I just am great. --K. Powers

Somebody may beat me, but they are going to have to bleed to do it. --Prefontaine



Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: kilted_thrower] #67950
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Just googled it, it would seem we have them.

Now I've read what they do, I have to ask, are they worth it?


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Just found out about your spouses affair?
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #68120
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Ahh, yes, the Chinese Tapeworm diet!!! Why didn't I think of that?

Or there's Ampu Systems - hack off an arm or a leg - you can drop 10 - 40 lbs instantly!

Or food poisoning diet. Just eat some fish or hamburger meat that's been left out at room temperature for a while - and you will be dropping the weight in no time! (Caution: may cause very uncomfortable bathroom situations). cool

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Raquel73] #68151
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The jaw wired shut technique is also quite effective, although I believe that given that opportunity I could ingest enough double chocolate malts to sustain my current weight for quite some time. I have also thought that if I could just sleep for a month I would be spot on my ideal weight.

God's Blessing,

Say

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Saynomore] #68173
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Originally Posted By: Saynomore
The jaw wired shut technique is also quite effective, although I believe that given that opportunity I could ingest enough double chocolate malts to sustain my current weight for quite some time. I have also thought that if I could just sleep for a month I would be spot on my ideal weight.

God's Blessing,

Say


That's funny and also interesting timing for you to post this, Say.

My dentist sent me to a specialist about 25 years ago for TMJ, for which the only cure at the time was jaw wiring. The specialist told me to come back when I had jaw clicks or headaches. Don't have headaches (KNOCK ON WOOD) but my jaw is starting to become annoying (have to try twice to open large enough to bite into a sub sandwich).

Now that you mention this, it gives me super incentive to get this eating under control and get the remaining 20 pounds OFF for good (before I go see another specialist for TMJ).

Maybe I'll check into these double chocolate malts you described. nod

Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #68636
02/12/11 04:41 PM
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I think the tapeworm sounds slightly less tortuous. I'm going for that option. Great suggestion!!!! That way I can still emotionally eat too!!!!


This year was a chocolate birthday (4 boxes and a bar)!!! Am I complaining???? And some quality chocs I had too. I still have some left (b'day yesterday)


Married 22years (this year) ~13y since dday(?)
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Which way do you like yourself? ~ Stosny
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Squeaky Tree] #68683
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HAPPY belated BIRTHDAY ST!
claps thumbsup waves dancing highfive hug waves grin nod :cupid: :9: read claps thumbsup waves dancing highfive hug waves grin nod
Maybe we can get L4 to 'bake' you a yummy chocolate cybercake.
::No sugar, no cholesterol, no colories, no fat (and no taste)::

You can get as emotional as you want as you whiff your monitor!!!! laugh1
Click to reveal..

I was gonna say LICK your monitor but then thought ewwwwwww! crazy




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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #68797
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Lookie what I found!!!!




Happy Belated Birthday, ST!!! hug

(Thanks L4....can't remember where I found this but you did it and I stole it for ST!)


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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #68799
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Texas - that narrows it a bit ...
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Texas - that narrows it a bit ...
Oh that's just not fair!

DH got me a box of See's candy for Valentines... I've restrained myself to 6 pieces so far.... must... stay...goood.....mmmm chocolate....nooooo


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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Vibrissa] #68859
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In all honesty, I have lost a stone since new years just by stopping drinking alcohol every day.

Before you all freak out, keep in mind that a couple of glasses of wine at tea time does not make one an alcoholic. nor does anything drunk between Christmas and new years eve grin


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Originally Posted By: lildoggie
honestly I have lost a stone since new years just by stopping drinking alcohol every day.
Before you all freak out, kep in mind that a couple of glasses of wine at tea time does not make one an alcoholic. nor does anything drunk between christmas and new years eve grin


That, Lil, is hysterical and so true. My DH has been sending me pix messages of flowers and candy all day with little love texts. I told him that I will adore all of that V-Day stuff from a distance this year. Maybe he can send a pic of champagne. ROFL

God's blessings,

Say

Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Saynomore] #80162
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Hey...how's everyone doing?

Ace


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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #81544
03/15/11 01:33 AM
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I've lost 10 lbs! And still going.....

So, now I'm at the weight I was before Christmas. crazy

But I'm doing well. I finally quit whining and did what I was supposed to - low carb, low fat, lots of veggies and lean meats, little fruit, and some yogurt. And lots of water - 64 ounces a day. I also exercise regularly. The first week was really hard. But everyone was right. After a while, the cravings lessen and go away. My stomach has shrunk. I am not hungry all the time and I don't feel the need to gorge until I'm bursting. The girl scout cookies remain on the top shelf and I don't touch them. The kids have their spaghetti and pizza and grilled cheese sandwiches, and I have my baked fish and chicken and salads. I have a lemon tree so I am always using lemons in my recipes. It's easy and good!

I got a new car (new to me, anyway)! It's a 2005 Toyota Camry, silver and very nice. It's a great addition to the family.

So, that's my update! How is everyone else doing?


Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Raquel73] #81654
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YEAAAA! Way to go, Raquel.

Water Water WATER is the key.....along with everything else you're doing.

Great job!

Keep it up!

Ace


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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #261619
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How's it going, Raquel? waves


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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #261679
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Oh, not as good as it could be. I lost some weight over the spring and actually dropped a size, and I was running and eating healthy and all that. Then, right as summer started, I was playing softball and while running the bases, I fell and twisted my ankle! It swelled up pretty bad and I learned that aging sucks and injuries now take a lot longer to heal than they did twenty years ago. I'm okay now, but it took about 2 months and there for a while, when I would try to walk or do a light jog, it would swell up, then go back down, then back up, then down again.

Then September happened - it was a very stressful month and I don't handle stress well. Back in May, my middle son, who is 14, the age of stupidity in boys, got the bright idea that he and his friend should sneak out in the middle of the night and break into the Middle School. So, about 2:30 AM, the sheriff was knocking at my door. I didn't even know he was gone. Apparently, he and his friend came up with a plan to sneak over to the school, jimmy the lock to the kitchen, and steal food (you know, because I don't feed him or anything). They thought they were so smart, and put socks on their hands to not leave fingerprints, and it never occurred to them there might be a silent alarm. So, they were caught with a duffel bag full of muffins and gummy worms. In his statement to the police, they were also going to get on the roof to retrieve the tennis balls that had been thrown up there. Fortunately, the sheriff released him to my custody instead of taking him to juvenile hall. It was so stupid and would have been almost funny if not for the whole juvenile court process.

We went to court last month, and as the date got closer I was a mess. The charge was for burglary, which is a felony, and at 14 you can be tried as an adult. As usual, when I am faced with something, I research the hell out of it, and I now I know all about how the criminal justice system works in California and the United States in general, and I am now a huge critic of the process. I learned so much that is just appalling. We met with a probation officer who mailed us her recommendation which was a program called "Deferred Entry of Judgement," which was a year long program with all sorts of requirements, like electronic monitoring, drug test, DNA sample, etc. I am not saying that my son should not have consequences for his actions - I know he broke the law and there are penalties. But he really is a good kid who did something stupid, and I felt this was just way over the top. So, naturally, I was very stressed and worried what would happen. I know he is 14 and it's his first offense, but I had no idea if he would get a judge who wanted to "teach him a lesson and make an example" or what. I was assigned a public defender, who I could not get a hold of and would not return my calls, so finally I went up there and demanded to speak to her. The one I was originally assigned to was busy, and her supervisor came out and said she was taking over. She was very nice and discussed what she would ask for. I also had letters written on his behalf from my Pastor and a good friend.

So, at court, they reduced the charge to a misdemeanor, he has one month of home supervision, 6 months of probation, 28 hours of community service, and we both have to complete a counseling program on "Attitudes and Behaviors." And there's a long list of rules he has to follow - don't get suspended, obey curfew, etc. After 6 months, all is well and at 18 his record will be sealed. I had grounded him for about a month immediately following the incident, and he understands the seriousness of the situation. People at my church, my friends and family, coworkers and boss have all been wonderful and understanding, and have really been stepping up to the plate with mentoring my son and being there for us.

So, I was a very stressed out mess last month. My eating was not healthy, I started smoking again (I know, it's bad and a horrible way to handle stress - it's not permanent, but I felt like I did when I was going through my divorce), but I haven't gained my weight back.

Regarding my son - well, I feel a couple of ways about it. I do know he did wrong and should suffer consequences for it. But it also occurs to me that, 30 years ago, the cops would have just brought him home, gave him a good talking to and we may have had to pay a fine and repaired the door. What he did was a stupid, childish act, but it truly did not have malice - they did not vandalize anything and there was a cash register with money, and they did not take any of that. Today, it's a huge, scary ordeal - and expensive! I have to pay for everything - Home Supervision is $7/day (and they don't do anything), the Probation officer is $209/month, the public Defender is $319.00 (and I just assumed they were there for poor people and got their salary from the government), whatever the restitution is to the school (that hearing is next month), and the counseling program, not to mention all the fees, fines, court costs. Thank God he did not have to go to Juvenile Hall, because they charge $129.00/day. Great for low-income families! But it's okay, because I can fill out ppw regarding my ability to pay, which means they will set me up on payments (for an additional fee, of course.

I know a lot of people may disagree with me, but after all my research I feel the criminal justice system and prison industrial complex is a huge travesty in American Society. It has really opened my eyes. I don't think it occurs to most people how the system actually works (or doesn't) until it affects them personally.




Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Raquel73] #261703
10/21/12 08:04 PM
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Since this thread is not on a protected forum, I can't tell you the specifics but I do know first hand how difficult it is to deal with our legal system, especially if you have no money to hire a high-powered attorney when your union-provided counsel throws you under the bus. eek

Click to reveal..
Don't. Get. Me. Started.



I am an emotional eater, too and during this (and other grueling ordeals) I did gain some of my weight back....so I know that drill, too. Now the effects of the excess weight is coming back to really haunt me healthwise. Guess I'd better start taking my own advice to re-lose these pounds, eh?

Thanks for sharing, Raquel. I agree with you on most of your issues.

Ace

ETA: Congratulations on losing the size last spring. It's probably like dropping a 10-15 pound bag of potatoes so trying carrying that around, jump on the scale, and then drop the bag! That's a great feeling when you see the scale drop before your eyes! wink

Last edited by Ace; 10/21/12 08:06 PM.

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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #262495
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #266495
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Its coming up to that time of year when I eat and eat and eat.

I've just realised I managed to go food shopping and forget to buy the Christmas pies. I do however have crisps and chocolate....

Do we have ideas on reducing the seasonal overload?


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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Lil] #266521
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Allow yourself to taste and savor anything, but only really EAT things that are worth it and/or healthy for you.

Now wait, I know this sounds impossible. But after the third or fourth bite of something delicious make yourself pause, and THINK about if it is truly serving you to eat that. Do you even want/need more? If not, pitch it. If you feel like you are still actually HUNGRY, then mindfully eat something that will satisfy and nourish you. If you aren't then, just savor what you ate, know that it was delicious, and let it go.

It has worked for both me and my mom...it can work for you too!


When we open to this moment and don't judge it or try to change it, even when we're suffering and wish it were otherwise, we tap into the spaciousness of mind that allows us to move forward skillfully, with discernment and joy. -- Sharon Salzberg
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Miranda] #266551
11/30/12 06:42 PM
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Hi Miranda! Thanks for bumping this thread, Lil.

I just had my monthly weigh-in at Curves. I had the audacity to set the goal of losing 10 pounds in the month of November, even though it was a horribly challenging month emotionally, included 2 weeks vacation and the Thanksgiving "EAT ALL DAY" holiday weekend.

I didn't lose the 10 pounds I had hoped! frown

Click to reveal..
I lost 11 pounds since Halloween claps


Click to reveal..
Plus, I lost a cumulative 5 and 3/4 inches!


How did I do it?

I did similar things that Miranda suggested: Contemplate the worth of the pleasure now or the pounds later.

1. I ate everything I wanted, just not very much very often. I love Trader Joes Cheetos but I put them in little 1 ounce baggies and only had one baggie a day.

2. I drink water, plain water (or Smart water to get extra electrolytes) whenever I get the urge to over indulge.

3. I find other tasks that need to be done instead of focusing on food.

4. I take a whiff of something scrumptious and close the lid. (This worked especially when something was on the staff table.)

5. This doesn't work for most but I need the visual results of weighing on my scale every day. (Others use clothes fitting looser or snugger as their gauge but the scale works for me....I even packed it in my suitcase. Don't laugh...11 pounds don't lie.)

6. I heard that Zig Ziglar died a couple days ago and he had some great tips for losing weight I'll have to look up.

Lil, as far as your question about how to NOT eat and eat and eat during the holidays (or any time of the year)....have you ever kept a food log? Just thinking that I'll have to write something down has kept me from overeating in the past.

Miranda, what else have you and your Mom done to get and keep healthy? BTW, I never "DIEt" as I'd rather focus on "LIVE-ing healthy habits."

Last edited by Ace; 11/30/12 07:12 PM.

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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #266552
11/30/12 06:54 PM
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Ace,

My mom rides her stationary bike or swims every single day.

I don't do anything else. Actually, I'm fat. I can just come out and say it. I need to lose about 70 lbs. But I've been this size before and lost it, and I know the deprivation doesn't work. You have to allow yourself to have things, but CONTROL yourself about the amount. If there's something you cannot control yourself around, you need to try not to be around it, but otherwise, just a smidge is all you really need to enjoy it. If your mind is right.

When I lost it the first time, I worked out EVERY day. No exceptions, no excuses. I went to the gym before anything else. I did 3-4x a week cardio (started with rowing, then moved up to treadmill, then to stair climber) and 3-4x a week weight training. I eventually came to the point where I craved the gym. My body NEEDED it, I felt stiff, sore, sluggish and not myself if I slacked off or tried to skip. Did I enjoy it? Nope, never did learn to enjoy exercise. I hate it. That's one of the reasons that I had to do it first before anything. Otherwise dread would keep me away. If I got out of bed and headed straight to gym, by the time I woke up all the way I was 3/4 of the way done! thumbsup

I just haven't been able to motivate myself to go back to that lifestyle. I have to get up at 6:30 to get to work by 7:30, and I am not getting to sleep before 11 or 11:30 because of DH's sexual needs, so....yeah, not motived to get up at 5:30 am! I need my 8 hours, and I'm only getting about 7. 6 isn't going to cut it for me, kwim?

I'll figure it out though. It's a work in progress.

oh, and PS, that's GREAT work on the month of November!! Go you claps


When we open to this moment and don't judge it or try to change it, even when we're suffering and wish it were otherwise, we tap into the spaciousness of mind that allows us to move forward skillfully, with discernment and joy. -- Sharon Salzberg
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Miranda] #266553
11/30/12 07:11 PM
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I gained over 100 pounds after marriage but lost 80 pounds from 2002 to 2007.

Due to a traumatic family situation, I started gradually regaining in 2008 and have regained nearly half of it back....until this month.

Click to reveal..
I now have a health condition that may have resulted from my extended obesity but I'm trying to avoid using meds and my doctors have said that re-losing the weight could help reduce the symptoms even if the condition is presently incurable.


That's my new motivation. I must admit that it was easier to lose when I was younger but 10 years later it's still possible. It's always a choice, every minute, every day, every week, every month. And you're right...it is a work in progress.


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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #266554
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Ace,

Weight loss/weight maintenance is much like marriage: "it was easier to lose when I was younger but 10 years later it's still possible. It's always a choice, every minute, every day, every week, every month. And you're right...it is a work in progress. "

LOL


When we open to this moment and don't judge it or try to change it, even when we're suffering and wish it were otherwise, we tap into the spaciousness of mind that allows us to move forward skillfully, with discernment and joy. -- Sharon Salzberg
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Miranda] #266573
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I didnt eat the crisps or chocolate, but i did have 4 glasses of wine, and thats going to become more common now it is officially tree day!



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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Lil] #266578
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I never count alcohol calories (not in wine anyways) I DO avoid cocktails I know are REALLY high calorie though (margaritas, etc.)


When we open to this moment and don't judge it or try to change it, even when we're suffering and wish it were otherwise, we tap into the spaciousness of mind that allows us to move forward skillfully, with discernment and joy. -- Sharon Salzberg
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Miranda] #266603
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I do, ever since I found out one bottle of wine has the same calorie value as a family size bar of chocolate (220gm)

So a bottle a day - not difficult to do over the holiday period is the same as eating a bar of chocolate by myself. Add to that I AM eating chocolate, lollies and other assorted delicious sweeties and abundant voluptuousness is only a heart attack away.


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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Lil] #266646
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Well, now see, Lil you have to set your priorities. I don't really eat sweets. I just don't care that much for them. So I would rather have wine (or a cocktail or two.) I also never (EVER) drink soda. But I love crisps. It's sort of like sorting out your top marital needs. Figure out your top 3-4 can't live withouts...then make room for them!


When we open to this moment and don't judge it or try to change it, even when we're suffering and wish it were otherwise, we tap into the spaciousness of mind that allows us to move forward skillfully, with discernment and joy. -- Sharon Salzberg
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Miranda] #266661
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I keep a food log, and stay under 1800 calories a day to maintain my desired weight. I slowly changed my eating habits to healthier food, and don't even bring junk food into the house. I've never been able to limit it. If I eat one potato chip, I finish the bag. No self control at all.


"I feel sad that I focused so much on his potential and so little on mine."
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: believer] #266668
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Originally Posted By: believer
If I eat one potato chip, I finish the bag. No self control at all.


Good point, B. BTW, you were very inspirational for me to adapt healthy habits on the other forum.

I was like you, always losing the "bet you can't eat just one" challenge. I love unsalted potato chips roasted in peanut oil but I divide a 7 ounce bag into 7 little one ounce bags (snack sized zip lock) and then plan to eat the entire tiny bag, one-a-day! That was part of my strategy during the month of Nov.

Deprivation never works. But it does take focusing on a goal to develop a tiny bit of will power. Impending health challenges are giving me that added motivation.


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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #266673
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I know deprivation doesn't work. That is why it is necessary to gradually change your eating habits over a couple of months. Otherwise you'll never stick to it.

I used to buy chips, pies, cakes, and ice cream and have them in the house all of the time. I gradually eliminated them and now I don't miss them at all. However, if I went up to the store today and bought chips and a pie, it would be gone by tonight. I know myself well.

I keep fresh fruits, veggies, and salad in the refrigerator all of the time, since I'm such a snacker. When it is ready to eat it is what I pick. I don't feel deprived or hungry ever.


"I feel sad that I focused so much on his potential and so little on mine."
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: believer] #266797
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B, you have the same food issues as me - if it's there it gets eaten! I don't buy it, which in some ways is a bit unfair on the kids - it will either teach them healthy habits or if they are like me, will go mad when ever there is an opportunity.

I find that aerobic exercise curbs my appetite a bit.

I am awful at rewarding myself with food - usually if I have had a really challenging time and got through it - but if I exercise well I am less likely to spoil my exercise efforts.


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Which way do you like yourself? ~ Stosny
Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Lil] #267617
12/07/12 04:44 PM
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Originally Posted By: Lil
I do, ever since I found out one bottle of wine has the same calorie value as a family size bar of chocolate (220gm)

So a bottle a day - not difficult to do over the holiday period is the same as eating a bar of chocolate by myself.


Speaking of bottles, Lil, I just bought a bottle of pure artesian water from Paeroa, New Zealand at my local Trader Joe's. I should find that thread about Trader Joe's and post this on it. I was drinking Zero Water but it has zero minerals in it (duh) and I was getting leg cramps so I switched to Smart Water (with electrolytes) and found this NZ water with 150 ppm of dissolved solid minerals.

It's pretty good H20.


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Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Squeaky Tree] #445065
07/10/20 09:55 PM
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Originally Posted by Squeaky Tree
Ace,

I'm with you - if I'm working hard in a tricky situation or if I'm ill then I reward myself with food treats.

It times of extreme anxiety and stress - when I feel powerless, I stop eating, lose appetite.


Hey, ST,

You and I are still here so I quoted you from nearly 10 years ago to bump this thread.

Someone was reading it so, again, it's time to RISE UP!

Thoughts?

Ace


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Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #445091
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15 pounds?

Underachiever


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Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #445092
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I have a roommate and the pantry is next to her bedroom door. The fear of waking her up with the metal pantry door is the main thing keeping me out of the pantry at night. My doctor gave me a prescription for Lomeira has anyone tried that?


"I have everything I need." and "I am exactly where I am supposed to be." ~Louise Hays
Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #445096
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Can you add soft felt pads where the door might bang into something?

Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #445098
07/23/20 12:06 PM
07/23/20 12:06 PM
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Lol Blair I’m relying on that fear to keep me out. But once I stop being hungry at night yes then that would be a good solution. And wd40 in the sliding mechanism.


"I have everything I need." and "I am exactly where I am supposed to be." ~Louise Hays
Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #445100
07/23/20 11:26 PM
07/23/20 11:26 PM
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Oh, then yeah - don't fix it! smile Sorry that I'm a fixer and I immediately thought how to make it more quiet. I'm working on my fixer personality.

Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Lil] #445115
07/28/20 08:16 AM
07/28/20 08:16 AM
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Originally Posted by Lil
15 pounds?

Underachiever


This made me laugh. lol

I’m keeping a close eye on the scale to keep it at fifteen. Every time the number goes closer to ten, for some reason I don’t mind at all getting it back to fifteen. I’ll start looking at it as an accomplishment although I think the credit actually belongs to Sam Adams. Lol

Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: NewEveryDay] #445116
07/28/20 08:57 AM
07/28/20 08:57 AM
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Originally Posted by NewEveryDay
Lol Blair I’m relying on that fear to keep me out. But once I stop being hungry at night yes then that would be a good solution. And wd40 in the sliding mechanism.

Going hungry is a trigger for me so, unlike Blair, I’m going to indulge the fixer part of me for a minute, lol.

Part of why I needed to lose the 50 lbs that I lost was because I was hungrier than others seemed to be. It resulted in my portions being bigger as well as eating more often.

Making the changes that my dr requested in order to lower my cholesterol resulted in learning a few things along the way. One of those things was that WHAT I was eating made a difference in my hunger level. Cutting out all fast food was a big part of managing my cholesterol and level of hunger. I noticed that when I started eating fast food again that I seemed to get hungrier and hungrier as time went on and that my portions on everything that I ate started increasing. Making “clones” of fast food at home doesn’t seem to do that. My daughter’s theory is that fast food has so little actual nutrition that eating it often might “fill me up” but my body screams for actual nourishment in the form of hunger.

Since hunger is a trigger that I would rather not have to deal with daily (part of my abuse involved food deprivation), I opted to eat until satisfied but selected “over eating” items from a short list of options that included chicken breast (with no breading or anything like that), fruits and vegetables (keeping the amount of fruit less than the amount of vegetables). I was never a vegetable eater but tossing in a bit of olive oil with seasonings and then roasting in the oven made it doable. An air fryer has been a game changer and vegetables are now usually part of my breakfast. Btw, it took about 10 months before my food intake had naturally adjusted to the normal range and I lost about 30 lbs during that adjustment period.

If something in that helps you, then great! But everyone’s body has its own quirks and needs so none of that might apply to your endeavor. Keep working on figuring out what your body needs no matter how long it takes. Feeling good at a healthy weight has made most things in my life less difficult and has made several things much, much better. I wish the same for you.

Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #445119
07/28/20 04:55 PM
07/28/20 04:55 PM
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Thanks LW this COVID thing has me cooking most of the time now and that helped a lot with eliminating fast food. YD has the opposite issue she’s not eating enough so that’s a good idea instead of switching out food altogether, because I’m mostly making some version of veggie bean soup to try to stay full, to try to add back some make at home versions of things she would eat too. I’m on weight watchers so those foods you mentioned are “free” in addition to eggs. I will get the hang of this thanks!


"I have everything I need." and "I am exactly where I am supposed to be." ~Louise Hays
Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #445124
07/30/20 03:57 AM
07/30/20 03:57 AM
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I do Weight Watchers, too, but haven’t been tracking much at all since COVID-19.

I want to mention that I needed to understand the difference between “free” (nothing is free, lol) and zero points. It makes a difference for me as far as portion size.

I make a breakfast sandwich with diner hash browns for a total of 7. And it is way more filling than the fast food version. Whole wheat english muffin with Brummel & Brown, wilted spinach, eggs, and turkey sausage patty. This trick for diner hash browns was recently learned: Wash and poke the potatoes and pressure cook for 3-4 minutes. Peel and refrigerate. Grate/shred when ready to use. Heat in pan with a bit of olive oil until they are to preferred crispness.

I recently found a clone for big mac sauce and will be trying it out soon. I’ll let you know.

I also have a clone for KFC seasoning that is pretty close. But I forgot the panko bread crumbs when I tried it so not sure yet if it's a good substitute for their fried chicken.

I have a clone recipe for Lawry’s taco seasoning that is almost exact.

Let me know if you’d like any of these recipes.

Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #445125
07/30/20 01:58 PM
07/30/20 01:58 PM
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LW: my wife is a guide at WW. One key is always having healthy snacks available. So when you get a craving, you have good choices in the fridge.

Of course, easier said than done. Many "good" choices" are fresh fruits and veggies that go bad much faster than shelf-stable snack food that can live in the pantry forever. So it either requires accepting a certain level of waste or accepting the need to make frequent trips to the grocer to make sure you always have good choices in the fridge or on the counter. Or make a few hard boiled eggs on Sunday so you can grab an egg quickly when you have a craving. If you wait to boil the egg until you have the craving, then you must exhibit extreme willpower not to "cheat" while you are waiting for the egg to boil. And every time you call on yourself to exert that willpower, it takes its toll psychologically. So make it easy on yourself to make healthy choices by having healthy choices on hand so you could grab them just as fast as you could grab the less healthy choices.

I am a snacker. Before covid, working from the office, my desk drawers were filled with shelf-stable snack food. Candy. Cookies, Pretzels. Now that I am home eating under Mrs. Hold's supervision, I still snack but I make better choices because we make sure to have healthy foods ready to grab. I have lost weight since we started quarantining, and I snack every morning and every afternoon. And often before bed, which is a real no-no.

This is difficult. No doubt about that. But it is possible. I look forward to the day when you achieve success. Stay safe.


Solutions? There are none. There are decisions.
Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #445128
07/30/20 11:08 PM
07/30/20 11:08 PM
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LW, I would love some of those recipes! Can you please PM me (or the whole group) the search terms?

I boil about half dozen eggs at a time, and about every 3-4 days. I always keep finger veggies and boiled eggs in the fridge for quick meals. My teenage DS turns into a wild animal when he realizes he is suddenly hungry. Besides, it's healthier than reaching for emotional support foods like candy and chocolate...

Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #445130
07/31/20 11:36 AM
07/31/20 11:36 AM
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Thanks for the tips, I never thought to do hash browns like that, sounds easier than fighting with paper towels to keep them from going gray. I am lucky there’s a fruit and veggie coop here that offers delivery so i always have plenty on hand. Any idea what to pair with for crudités? Mrs Dash is too peppery alone. Hummus adds up so fast unless I’m doing it wrong. What do you put in egg salad or is just hard boiled alone the way you do them? Do you use peanut butter or is there something else that goes with celery and apples? What kind of cereal do you recommend? Those are the gaps I’ve been missing most.

I’ve been doing those overnight oats they’re really good with nuts and blueberries but the nuts add up fast.


"I have everything I need." and "I am exactly where I am supposed to be." ~Louise Hays
Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #445133
07/31/20 09:11 PM
07/31/20 09:11 PM
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Hey guys if you get bored with the standard veggies for snacking I’ve found I’m wild for snow peas (not sugar snaps they’re not as good raw) and jicama!


When we open to this moment and don't judge it or try to change it, even when we're suffering and wish it were otherwise, we tap into the spaciousness of mind that allows us to move forward skillfully, with discernment and joy. -- Sharon Salzberg
Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #445138
08/02/20 01:02 AM
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Easy chicken salad is 2 boiled eggs, can of shredded chicken, mayo and about a tablespoon of relish (not sweet relish). You can put it with salad or in a pita or something else.

Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: holdingontoit] #445142
08/05/20 05:10 AM
08/05/20 05:10 AM
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Ace Online OP
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Originally Posted by holdingontoit
I have lost weight since we started quarantining, and I snack every morning and every afternoon. And often before bed, which is a real no-no.

This is difficult. No doubt about that. But it is possible. I look forward to the day when you achieve success. Stay safe.


Hey Hold....someone mentioned being an "overachiever" but I think you've given it new meaning. You and my DD40-something are the only ones I know who have lost weight while quarantining. She does fitness bets on the web....works for motivating her and she's winning money and getting really healthy, too.

Our Curves has reopened with strict protocols..... dance2work-outs only, no weigh-in/measurements allowed. But I jumped on the scale and have only gained 6 since March 3 so I'm feeling pretty good and getting back on track.

Thanks for all the healthy tips on this discussion. I can't believe it's the top trending thread....of course when we have so few of us brave enough to bypass the faux warning, it doesn't take much for a thread to trend.

Thanks again,
Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: LivingWell] #445264
11/21/20 06:39 PM
11/21/20 06:39 PM
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Originally Posted by LivingWell
I do Weight Watchers, too, but haven’t been tracking much at all since COVID-19.

I want to mention that I needed to understand the difference between “free” (nothing is free, lol) and zero points. It makes a difference for me as far as portion size.

I make a breakfast sandwich with diner hash browns for a total of 7. And it is way more filling than the fast food version. Whole wheat english muffin with Brummel & Brown, wilted spinach, eggs, and turkey sausage patty. This trick for diner hash browns was recently learned: Wash and poke the potatoes and pressure cook for 3-4 minutes. Peel and refrigerate. Grate/shred when ready to use. Heat in pan with a bit of olive oil until they are to preferred crispness.

I recently found a clone for big mac sauce and will be trying it out soon. I’ll let you know.

I also have a clone for KFC seasoning that is pretty close. But I forgot the panko bread crumbs when I tried it so not sure yet if it's a good substitute for their fried chicken.

I have a clone recipe for Lawry’s taco seasoning that is almost exact.

Let me know if you’d like any of these recipes.


Hey LW,

Here's a thread I found on your post log where you offered recipes. I'm interested.

Thanks,
Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #445276
11/26/20 12:40 AM
11/26/20 12:40 AM
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I'm interested too. smile

Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Blair] #445660
05/25/21 11:17 PM
05/25/21 11:17 PM
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Originally Posted by Ace
Originally Posted by LivingWell
I do Weight Watchers, too, but haven’t been tracking much at all since COVID-19.

I want to mention that I needed to understand the difference between “free” (nothing is free, lol) and zero points. It makes a difference for me as far as portion size.

I make a breakfast sandwich with diner hash browns for a total of 7. And it is way more filling than the fast food version. Whole wheat english muffin with Brummel & Brown, wilted spinach, eggs, and turkey sausage patty. This trick for diner hash browns was recently learned: Wash and poke the potatoes and pressure cook for 3-4 minutes. Peel and refrigerate. Grate/shred when ready to use. Heat in pan with a bit of olive oil until they are to preferred crispness.

I recently found a clone for big mac sauce and will be trying it out soon. I’ll let you know.

I also have a clone for KFC seasoning that is pretty close. But I forgot the panko bread crumbs when I tried it so not sure yet if it's a good substitute for their fried chicken.

I have a clone recipe for Lawry’s taco seasoning that is almost exact.

Let me know if you’d like any of these recipes.


Hey LW,

Here's a thread I found on your post log where you offered recipes. I'm interested.

Thanks,
Ace

Originally Posted by Blair
I'm interested too. smile


Hey, LW,

Hope you'll join us. We're interested in your recipes.

Ace


We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us).

Our Weird and Ongoing Story
Re: **Gained "Quarantine Fifteen" Pounds? How to Change Emotional Eating** [Re: Ace] #445674
05/27/21 02:19 AM
05/27/21 02:19 AM
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New Zealand
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I gained a bunch of weight, sort of from Covid, mostly by being in a bad mood for several months. I have lost some of that, really need to lose more but I am not being very well behaved with type of food or quantity. I intermittant fast fairly regularly - 3 to 4 times a week, but since I usually just each rubbish during my window, its a bit self defeating


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