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Well, here I am. #409914
05/25/16 02:06 AM
05/25/16 02:06 AM
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 4,657
L
LadyGrey Offline OP
Professional Attorney
LadyGrey  Offline OP
Professional Attorney
L
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 4,657
Who would have thunk it.


Bidden or not bidden God is present.
Re: Well, here I am. [Re: LadyGrey] #409918
05/25/16 11:57 AM
05/25/16 11:57 AM
Joined: Jan 2015
Posts: 658
MaidUpName Offline
Member
MaidUpName  Offline
Member
Joined: Jan 2015
Posts: 658
I'd 'ave thunk it.

You inspire me and your story reminds me that success is possible smile

Thank you for everything you've given to me and others.

MUN


You have brains in your head
You have feet in your shoes
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.
You're on your own and you know what you know
And YOU are the one who'll decide where you go
Dr Seuss
Re: Well, here I am. [Re: MaidUpName] #409951
05/26/16 12:51 AM
05/26/16 12:51 AM
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 4,657
L
LadyGrey Offline OP
Professional Attorney
LadyGrey  Offline OP
Professional Attorney
L
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 4,657
Originally Posted By: MaidUpName
I'd 'ave thunk it.

You inspire me and your story reminds me that success is possible smile

Thank you for everything you've given to me and others.

MUN


A lone voice crying in the wilderness.

I'll be curious to see what I have to say here. The title of the forum, Success Stories and Inspiration, is pretty intimidating.

But I decided to go on and start the thread for a couple of reasons. One, it bothered the hell out of me that NG's story was at the top of this forum. Don't get me wrong, I like NG just fine. It just seems to me unfair that the lead thread on MA in this forum involves a gun.

The other reason is that I realized I was being mentally intimidated by a bunch of folks who wrote my marriage and me off a long time ago. "They" (whoever "they" are) would roll their eyes and prognosticate doom to my current bout of optimism.

The last reason is that I decided that my definition of success is the only one that really matters in this context. Of course, my husband's definition of success also matters but he's not here.

Let me give you something concrete to go on.

Almost six years ago, I lied to my husband and had my breast biopsy on the Friday while he was hunting when it was meant to be on the following Monday. I went home, traumatized by an ordeal I'd not been prepared for, and sat on the couch researching breast cancer which made all the sense to me of Greek. I called him before he was driving back on the Sunday to tell him to stay and hunt another day because it was done, having spent the weekend by myself consulting Dr. Google to the point where I had a baseline understanding of what I was looking at. The biopsy was a formality. I knew.

Today, my husband drove me an hour to my endometrial biopsy. We stopped on the way home and had a beer and a brat. I asked him to take me to Lowe's to look at flowers and he did. He made dinner in the crock pot this morning.

Six years is a long time.


Bidden or not bidden God is present.
Re: Well, here I am. [Re: LadyGrey] #409953
05/26/16 01:08 AM
05/26/16 01:08 AM
Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 10,121
S
SmilingWife Offline
Global Moderator
SmilingWife  Offline
Global Moderator
S
Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 10,121
I didn't know you were having this latest biopsy. I am sorry you have health issues again.

However you have come a long ways in your relationship with your Dh.

Good for you. smile

I do think of you as a success story.

Re: Well, here I am. [Re: SmilingWife] #409960
05/26/16 02:39 AM
05/26/16 02:39 AM
Joined: Nov 2012
Posts: 13,424
midwest
Miranda Offline
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Miranda  Offline
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Joined: Nov 2012
Posts: 13,424
midwest
Wow. If that's not success I don't know what to call it.

Thanks for sharing that LG.


When we open to this moment and don't judge it or try to change it, even when we're suffering and wish it were otherwise, we tap into the spaciousness of mind that allows us to move forward skillfully, with discernment and joy. -- Sharon Salzberg
Re: Well, here I am. [Re: Miranda] #409966
05/26/16 04:10 AM
05/26/16 04:10 AM
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 4,680
B
Blair Offline
Member
Blair  Offline
Member
B
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 4,680
You've come a long way, Babe! smile You are an inspiration!

Re: Well, here I am. [Re: Blair] #409998
05/26/16 06:04 PM
05/26/16 06:04 PM
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 7,052
holdingontoit Offline
Global Moderator
holdingontoit  Offline
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Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 7,052
I agree. Success is getting what you aimed for. Not what someone else believes you should have aimed for.


Solutions? There are none. There are decisions.
Re: Well, here I am. [Re: holdingontoit] #410011
05/26/16 10:29 PM
05/26/16 10:29 PM
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 5,690
SoCal
Chrysalis Offline
Global Moderator
Chrysalis  Offline
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Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 5,690
SoCal
Good for you. I'm proud of you for your honesty and willingness to put it all out there.

We're getting to a place of acceptance, too, at least as far as the marriage goes.


Chrysalis
Re: Well, here I am. [Re: LadyGrey] #410151
05/30/16 05:38 AM
05/30/16 05:38 AM
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 5,222
L
LivingWell Offline
Member
LivingWell  Offline
Member
L
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 5,222
Originally Posted By: LadyGrey
Who would have thunk it.

Me grin

Re: Well, here I am. [Re: LadyGrey] #410196
05/31/16 05:17 AM
05/31/16 05:17 AM
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 7,467
right here waiting Offline
Board of Directors
President
right here waiting  Offline
Board of Directors
President
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 7,467
Originally Posted By: LadyGrey
The last reason is that I decided that my definition of success is the only one that really matters in this context.


I nearly shouted "Hooray!" for this one. Dear Lady, you are the only arbiter of your success.

Originally Posted By: LadyGrey
Today, my husband drove me an hour to my endometrial biopsy. We stopped on the way home and had a beer and a brat. I asked him to take me to Lowe's to look at flowers and he did. He made dinner in the crock pot this morning.

Six years is a long time.


I rejoice in the peace this simple report conveys. You have struggled so long...
You sooo deserve this. hug

Re: Well, here I am. [Re: LadyGrey] #410313
06/01/16 12:48 PM
06/01/16 12:48 PM
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 1,285
PEEKSKILL NY
Rich57 Offline
Advocate
Rich57  Offline
Advocate
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 1,285
PEEKSKILL NY
Originally Posted By: LadyGrey
One, it bothered the hell out of me that NG's story was at the top of this forum.


CONGRATS!

Yes it bothered me too that no one else had posted here in 2 years.

Glad you took care of that!

Lets get some more posts here too!

Re: Well, here I am. [Re: Rich57] #410320
06/01/16 01:46 PM
06/01/16 01:46 PM
Joined: Nov 2012
Posts: 13,424
midwest
Miranda Offline
Global Moderator
Miranda  Offline
Global Moderator
Joined: Nov 2012
Posts: 13,424
midwest
I think MORE folks should post here too! I'm not ready to consider myself appropriate for this forum, but there are certainly plenty of people who post here that qualify!


When we open to this moment and don't judge it or try to change it, even when we're suffering and wish it were otherwise, we tap into the spaciousness of mind that allows us to move forward skillfully, with discernment and joy. -- Sharon Salzberg
Re: Well, here I am. [Re: Miranda] #411140
06/17/16 12:18 PM
06/17/16 12:18 PM
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 5,407
Not quite here
Squeaky Tree Offline
Member
Squeaky Tree  Offline
Member
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 5,407
Not quite here
HA! Brill! Love that you're here! As I said over on yer blog: what a difference I hear!

Whilst the journey is ongoing and there are mountains and valleys to circumvent it is so hard to see differences and changes.

Stepping back and taking a view of where you've come from is the all important step in a positive feedback loop smile


Married 22years (this year) ~13y since dday(?)
DD17 DS14
Which way do you like yourself? ~ Stosny
Re: Well, here I am. [Re: LadyGrey] #412210
07/21/16 02:30 PM
07/21/16 02:30 PM
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 12,611
The Dark Side of the Moon
AntigoneRisen Offline
Board of Directors
AntigoneRisen  Offline
Board of Directors
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 12,611
The Dark Side of the Moon
I think your appearance on this board is long overdue.


Critical Thinking: The Other National Deficit

"That which can be asserted without evidence can be dismissed without evidence." - Christopher Hitchens

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